“Under the bed,” Leilani replied, not looking up at Shi Shu yet. His brows were furrowed and his eyes concentrated on the lingerie. He couldn’t put the pieces together. None of them made sense. It was like he was so close to the answer, and yet every time he reached for it there was a simple fact standing in his way. Shi Shu had a husband and it wasn’t him.
“What…are we?” Leilani asked, his fingers gripping the fabric tighter as he raised his gaze to look at Shi Shu.
“I know the type of person I am, and the type of person my parents raised me to be. I…I’m not the sort of person who would do this, Shi Shu. I’m not someone who would cheat like that. No matter how much I loved someone, and I don’t know why, but I can feel in my heart that I love you so, so much,” Leilani said.“But when I saw this, there were so many memories of us kissing and touching and — I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, because I do feel that way about you, and I love you, I really do, but it just doesn’t make any sense!” Leilani said. “I would never do that. I could never do that to someone who was married. I can’t wrap my head around it.”
He was a good person, he had morals, he would never cheat. He just couldn’t see it. But then there were so many memories of him and Shi Shu together, doing things that were meant specifically for couples. It wasn’t right.
“You’re married, Shi Shu, and as much as I love you, I can’t go on with that behavior. I don’t know how I ended up doing all of that, but we can’t do that. We shouldn’t even be sharing a bed! It’s not right, and I’m sorry, but we can’t…be as we are. If we keep doing what we’re doing I don’t think I’ll be able to stop myself.”Especially with all of these new memories to fuel his brain. He wanted more, he craved it, and he knew that Shi Shu was in an uncomfortable marriage. He wanted to steal him away. He wanted to take him as his own and love him the way he was meant to be loved, but he couldn’t. They had to stop. They had to go back to how their relationship was supposed to be — a chief and his advisor. That was all.
It was like watching a carriage coming undone, and crashing straight into a wall, a«while Shu Shu could do nothing but stand there, wondering how that happened, while he held onto the wheel that he’d removed from the carriage with his own hands.
Sitting on his (their) bed, holding onto a piece of fabric that Shi Shu could hardly bear to look at, Leilani looked as if he’d taken an arrow to the gut, his expression confused and more pained than it should ever be. The only occasion where he’d ever looked at him like that, was when he finally found him again after 5 years apart, and even then, that pain had been laced with relief, with happiness…
There was no such thing in this Leilani’s face, though. There was only pain, confusion, and a sense of betrayal that his brain could neither process nor comprehend, and the sole culprit of that was Shi Shu alone.
He could blame the spell, Leilani’s idiotic idea, but the truth was, in the end, it was Shi Shu and his smartass attitude that had decided that Leilani didn’t need to know, that maybe he shouldn’t know that they were married, and while he’d made that decision with the best of intentions…it had been just a wild guess, no research put into it, a spur of the moment decision that had brought so much pain to his own husband.It wasn’t Leilani who kept them apart, it wasn’t the spell, it wasn’t the amnesia; it was Shi Shu, and now Leilani was the one paying the consequences. All because he didn’t think to stop to think and ask everybody else about their thoughts on the situation.
In the end, he’d been so concerned over the idea of Leilani being uncomfortable being stuck in a marriage with a man that he couldn’t even remember, that it didn’t even occur to him that this Leilani was also the same Leilani that had fallen for him on first sight.
And if a fourteen years old Leilan fell for him that easily….then how could his 20 years old husband not follow the same path?Swallowing down the dry lump stuck in his throat, Shi Shu slowly folded his fan closed, placing it down on the desk. “…Ah, funny….to think I did all of this thinking that it would save you from unnecessary struggles….the irony is truly a cruel thing.” He muttered, chuckling humorlessly, shame keeping his gaze locked on his own feet. “…I need to show you something. Just, wait here, okay nuan nan?” Not waiting for his answer, Shi Shu rushed out of the room.
He returned moments later, carrying a bottle full of black sand in his hands, holding it like it was the most precious jewel in the entire continent. Walking over to the bed, Shi Shu took a seat across him and stared down at the bottle on his lap, tracing his thumbs across it’s surface—polished; he’d made sure to clean it every day.
“Do you remember what this is? I suppose you would, given how many memories you’ve obtained in our last session. You should be able to recognize this and know what it is.” Shi Shu mused, his lips twitching into a tiny fond smile. “It’s from my wedding. But you know? I never got to experience that special dream that the bottle is meant to provide to the couple the night before the wedding. I was so stressed and scared, I couldn’t bat an eye all night…so I never go to see my husband’s memories. I was heavily disappointed when I realized what I missed out…”
Sighing, Shi Shu took a moment to ponder on his words and to watch the sand shift inside the bottle, and finally looked up to meet Leilani’s gaze, his smile soft and terribly fond. “I think my husband realized that too. That’s why he’s gone, you know? It’s not that he wanted to leave me alone on my own birthday, it’s just that…he picked a rather unconventional birthday gift, and things didn’t turn out well for him.” It was…an understatement, but then, who was he to even comment on Leilani’s mistakes considering the ongoing descent of his own idiotic weak-excuse-of-a-plan.Wetting his lips, suddenly feeling his throat very dry again, Shi Shu cleared his throat and just….kept moving forward. His mistake, his responsibility. He owed Leilani this much. “Ah, I’ve never told you anything about my husband, did I?” He asked, and despite his strained tone, a smile still tilted his lips without him even meaning to, his eyes immediately softening. “…It’s unfair, you know? I’m nothing worthy of showing off, and yet he’s always so eager to point out that I’m his husband, waxing all sorts of poetry about me, like he’s the one blessed to have me as a spouse, instead of the other way around.” He mumbled, cheeks pinking already and gosh, Leilani wasn’t even ‘back’ yet and he was already making a mess out of him!
(He missed that. He missed the way he could make him blush over everything and anything. He missed his teasing grin, the way his voice deepened when he spoke after a specially passionate kiss, he just….missed him. A lot.)
Clearing his throat again, Shi Shu fiddled with the bottle again, careful to not let his hands get sweaty to the point of smudging the glass. “And yet, I haven’t told you anything about him yet, have I? Truly, I’m the most terrible and lousy spouse that anyone could ever have.” He chuckled, the nervousness so obvious that he nearly cringed at the sound. “My husband…he’s the most wonderful man that I’ve ever met.” Shi Shu muttered, already terribly tempted to duck and bury his face on Leilani’s chest, embarrassment coloring his cheeks red.
“His kindness knows no bounds, it’s almost ridiculous, I have to handle anything business-related because he’s just kind enough to let other people take advantage of him. He’s so sweet that my blood pressure has suffered quite drastically since I moved in with him, without even getting started on all the future heart issues that I’ll probably have from prolonged exposure to his pure, raw sweetness! And his patience, heavens know how patient he has been with me all this time…”Shi Shu trailed off, swallowing hard when the lump in his throat suddenly became sharp and painful, like something pointy dragging up and down, threatening to pierce through his neck. “…I love him. I love him more than anything or anybody else in the world and….and how ridiculous is it that…that I’ve never even told him that before?” Shi Shu nearly croaked out, the tiniest of breathless laughs squeezing through his throat. “I think I…I took his love for granted, you know? His patience, his kindness, his everything, everything that he is and that makes him so wonderful, in my head I think I’ve always figured that we would have all the time in the world to do all those things that we haven’t done yet…I didn’t say ‘i love you’ because I thought, I’m not ready yet but, we have such a long life ahead of us, so why hurry? I pushed him away in bed every single time he touched me, constantly telling him and myself that I wasn’t ready yet and that we had all the time in the world anyway, so why rush?”
Too nervous, Too anxious. Too soon. It can happen later. No Need to hurry.
Shi Shu hadn’t even realized how much he’d relied on those excuses, just…straight up adding unnecessary obstacles in front of them for no other reason other than ‘we have time’.
Except, what if they didn’t?
Their lives were so long, Shi Shu had always been sure that they would have at the very least, 300 years of happy marriage ahead of them….that is, until Leilani woke up, and looked at him as if he was a stranger, and suddenly Shi Shu was abruptly faced with a terrifying realization; what if that time was cut short? What if Leilani lost his memories permanently? What if he had to win his heart over again, what if he had to wait years for Leilani to look at him the same way he used to?
What if his Leilani was gone, permanently?
How many regrets would he have? All those kisses that he didn’t give him, all those nights where he’d stopped his hands from wandering underneath his clothes, all those words that he wished that he’d said…all the things that he didn’t do, and that he wouldn’t ever get the chance of doing if Leilani was gone.
Maybe this wasn’t karma, after all.
Maybe it was just a wakeup call, the Universe’s way of telling him ‘you’re letting precious time slip through your fingers; make good use of it while you can’.Gently, Shi Shu took Leilani’s hands between his, thumbs tracing over his knuckles. “…I miss him. A lot. I want him to come back already.” Shi Shu muttered, eyes prickling but he refused to break now out of all times; he had to finish what he’d started, or this would be just yet another regret to add to the list. “But…getting him back is quite troublesome because, well…my husband is an idiot.” Shi Shu chuckled, slowly intertwining their fingers together, a sight that was so familiar to him but that he would never tire of. “He was so sad that I didn’t get to experience his memories on the night before our wedding….that he decided that he was going to make me a new bottle.”
Smiling softly, Shi Shu untangled one of his hands free, and gently cupped Leilani’s cheek, thumb tracing his cheekbone lovingly. “But like I’ve mentioned; my husband is an idiot. The sweetest, kindest and most wonderful idiot that I’ve ever met. The type of wonderful idiot that accidentally erases his own memories while trying to store some of them in a new bottle…just to offer them to me as a birthday gift.”
Giving him an exasperated smile, practically dripping with fondness, Shi Shu leaned closer, and pressed his lips softly against his cheek. “My husband is running late, though…I think it’s about time he comes back home.” He murmured against his cheek, squeezing their intertwined hands.
Well, now he was really confused. Shi Shu was hiding something from him — something he’d done in an attempt to make his life easier, but damn, everything was confusing as hell now! And then, because Shi Shu apparently liked to add insult to injury, when he returned to the room it was to talk about his husband and his marriage and how much he apparently loved him.
Was he trying to hurt him? Was he trying to make things worse for him? It was…cruel. Everything he’d been led to believe and everything he thought he knew about Shi Shu’s husband was turned on its head. Leilani had opened his heart to Shi Shu, he had told him everything he felt, and Shi Shu let him. Then, on top of that, there were all these memories of them together. It wasn’t fair. Why did he have these memories if Shi Shu wasn’t with him? If Shi Shu’s husband was such a nice guy, then why did he betray him? Why did they both betray him?
Shi Shu even had the gall to be so kind to him right now, talking to him as if this wasn’t breaking his heart, holding his hands and sitting close to him. It didn’t make sense and if he was confused now then Shi Shu was clearly only making things worse.
His heart felt like it was shattering into a million little pieces, and he was falling, but not in the way he had when he first opened his eyes. He was falling into an abyss, spinning out of control, and he had no idea when it would stop. Not only was he being dumped — that was what it felt like — but he was also being compared to someone who sounded perfect for Shi Shu, someone he loved. On top of that, too, was the confusion. His body hurt, physically and emotionally, and he couldn’t take it.
Shi Shu pressed his hand to his cheek and instead of stinging it felt comfortable and he hated that. He hated it until he spoke.
If he had been falling, then now he had hit the ground — and he hit it hard.
Memories flooded back to him, a caravan filled with dancers and musicians, a formal wedding, Shi Shu kneeling beside him at the alter, a pathetic attempt at a dance, months of longing for a few weeks of visiting, years of waiting and fear, him falling into Shi Shu’s broken arms, the two of them marrying again, their first kisses, their shared words of admiration for each other.
Everything clicked into place, and the moment Shi Shu pulled away from his cheek Leilani turned and threw his arms around him, pinning them both down onto the bed and nearly sending the, thankfully corked, bottle of sand flying.
Shi Shu was his husband. They were married. They’d been married since he was a child. Of course. Of course. How could he have forgotten?! How had he could have forgotten everything?
Leilani didn’t know what to do. It felt almost as if he had been gone for the last few days and was truly seeing Shi Shu again for the first time. He ran his hands over his cheeks and into his hair and pressed kisses to his lips and his jaw, heart pounding in his chest.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry — I didn’t know. I thought I did it right. I just wanted to surprise you — I had no idea. Ku’uipo, I’m so sorry. You must’ve been so worried. It’s me. I’m here. I’m here,” Leilani said as he pulled away, though it could hardly be called that. He was still practically laying on top of him, scared to let him go — scared he might forget him again.
“Are you okay? I should move. I’m sorry,” Leilani said.
He finally moved off of him and knelt beside him on the bed, finding his hands with his own trembling fingers, holding them tight. The last few days were like a whirlwind and the last few moments had him spinning. He’d missed his birthday. His first birthday in Pali Kai. He’d made him so troubled and worried. Shi Shu didn’t deserve that. Shi Shu only deserved a lifetime of happiness, and that was what he’d been trying to give him. It was all he ever wanted to do. Instead, he nearly broke his heart.
Wait.
“Did…you just say you loved me?”
Shi Shu watched as the pieces connected on Leilani’s head, waiting anxiously—praying that he was right, that he hadn’t just messed up things even further, if such was even possible!
Swallowing nervously, Shi Shu opened his mouth to give it another try, maybe he needed another hint, maybe he should be a little clearer—
But his concerns were squeezed out of his body along with a startled squeak, as Leilani pounced on him like an overeager puppy, and while the Shi Shu from a week ago might have felt a bit intimidated and maybe even a bit nervous over the idea of being squished underneath Leilani’s body, this current Shi Shu welcomed it with open arms. It was comforting, to feel his weight on him, a grounding pressure that reminded and confirmed to him that this was happening, this was real.
His husband was back.
Shi Shu couldn’t even help the giggles that blurted out of him as Leilani poured kisses all over him, his chest so full and warm that it nearly hurt from the sheer happiness and overwhelming relief that came pouring in, filling in the holes and patching up the wounds that Shi Shu had neglected.
“Shh it’s okay, nuan nuan, you’re back now. You’re back.“ He whispered once his lips were free, tilting his head to press his lips against the hand cupping his cheek.
How could he have ever thought of this as ‘embarrassing’ or ‘shameful’? There was nothing to be embarrassed about the way Leilani poured all his love into him like it was his life’s mission, there was nothing shameful about the way that Shi Shu wanted to wrap himself around him and hold him until every bone in his body hurt.
The only ‘shameful’ thing in this whole relationship, was how long it had taken him to realize that.
For once, in an ironic turn of events, this time it was Shi Shu who didn’t want Leilani to let go yet. He wanted to just stay there, laying down on their bed, holding onto him, feeling his every breath, every heartbeat, hands in his hair and his mouth on every inch of skin that he could reach, hungry in a way that he had never thought possible.
Unfortunately, Leilani was too well trained; once he hit the imaginary time up stipulated by Shi Shu’s nervous self, he pulled away, sitting back only to lock their hands together, looking so shaky and agitated that Shi Shu wanted to do nothing more than hold him close and kiss him until there wasn’t a single trace of anxiety on his face.
That, though, would have to wait for it’s turn, because first, of course; Leilani had to make a flustered mess out of his husband within the first two minutes after he just got him back.
A new record!
Face reddening spectacularly, Shi Shu felt his fingers itch with the urge to reach over for his fan to hide his face….but he didn’t.
Enough of the fan, enough with the excuses, enough with the obsessive ‘what ifs’; he was so tired, so darn tired, so done with denying himself what he wanted—what they wanted.
“….No.” Shi Shu said, very firm despite the fact that he was sporting one of the most vicious shades of red that had ever decorated his face. Then, freeing his hands from Leilani’s grip, Shi Shu stomped down two decades of manners, etiquette and self-restraint, and stood up on the bed, only just so that he could move over and take a seat on Leilani’s lap instead, out of all places.
Like a lock snapping into place, Shi Shu crossed his ankles behind Leilani’s back and wrapped his arms around his neck, pulling him in so close, so close that not a string of hair would be able to squeeze between their bodies, as if it was his plan to actually merge them together until they became one single giant body mass.
“…You don’t get to leave me on my birthday and then pull away from me as well.” Shi Shu mumbled from where he had his face buried on Leilani’s neck, tightening his grip around him as he breathed in the scent that he now fully acknowledged as ‘home’, eyes still prickling despite the smile stretched across his face.
“One of my siblings describes their marriage as ‘house arrest except with cuddle benefits’. In that case, consider yourself under arrest, mister; your sentence is that you can’t leave this bed until my quota of kisses and cuddles has been fulfilled.” He declared, pressing a long string of butterfly kisses across Leilani’s neck and all the way up to his jaw, where the kisses began to linger a little longer, especially as he kissed his cheeks, forehead and, finally, his lips, where he pressed long, dragged out kisses, his fingertips retracing the paths that his lips had already drawn across his skin, before losing themselves in Leilani’s soft curls, like a famished man enjoying a meal for the first time in days.
Only then, when Shi Shu was satisfied and officially breathless, did he finally pull away—if it could even be called that; it was barely enough for them to catch their breath, their noses and forehead pressed together, lips close enough that they could graze each other with just the tiniest tilt of their heads.
“…I guess it takes one bout of amnesia and two kissless days to, as Ji Guang so kindly put it: ‘get that stick out of my ass’, huh?” Shi Shu mumbled, blurting out a tiny nervous giggle, quickly sobering up though, as he stared warmly into Leilani’s eyes, hands gently cupping his face again, sighing contently.
“I love you, A-Leilani.” Shi Shu whispered, practically nuzzling his face as he pulled him into another kiss, arms wrapping tightly around him again, his grip edging between desperate and possessive, like a dragon hoarding his precious treasure. “I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry… I shouldn't…shouldn’t have taken such a long time to say it! There’s so many things that I should have done and said earlier, and that is just one out of too many things that I want to tell you.”
He sighed against his lips, fingertips dragging across Leilani’s scalp with each motion of his fingers combing through his hair, like he just couldn’t stay still or stop touching him—as if he would vanish if he did. “Things will be better from now on. No more pushing away, no more stopping, no more excuses, I’m…”
Shi Shu trailed off, the reddish hue quickly returning to his face as he took one of Leilani’s hands and, taking advantage of this possibly-temporary bout of courage; shakily placed that hand on top of one of his horns, wrapping his fingers around it.
“…You have permission to t-touch them.” Shi Shu mumbled, so red that even his horns were starting to heat up as well. Then, because he owed him this much, he added; “I…w-want you to touch them.” He clarified, only not completely mortified to death because he actually meant it.
No?
Leilani scoffed, a smirk tilting his lips. Liar. He’d heard him say it! Did he miss him so badly that he managed to finally blurt that out? They really were going to have to have a talk about just when Shi Shu felt comfortable talking to him. But maybe not now. Right now, Shi Shu seemed determined to make up for lost time — either that or surprise him completely.He stood up on the bed, and if that wasn’t shocking enough, promptly plopped himself down on his lap.
Leilani had always been the one to make the first move. He had no problem laying his head in Shi Shu’s lap or curling up against him. He delighted in the moments where Shi Shu would hold his arm, and he expected to not get anything more. Shi Shu wanted to take his time, and that was fine. Leilani was just happy to have his feelings returned. Anything more was a bonus.
He wrapped his arms around Shi Shu, resting his hands in the small of his back, keeping him close while he placed kisses along his skin. He wanted to make a joke about how this couldn’t possibly be his Shi Shu and how he had definitely gotten himself sick or feverish because there was no way Shi Shu would kiss him like this, but…he kept his mouth shut.He wanted to enjoy this. He had been waiting so long for some kind of positive response from Shi Shu. He knew that Shi Shu liked him, but whenever things got too physical, he tended to shy away — despite obviously liking certain things. He liked being kissed, and he liked touching his hair. Somehow, Shi Shu still felt as if he needed to restrain himself.
Leilani returned every kiss to his lips and leaned into each touch, reveling in these delightful feelings. They were back. They were both here.
“Mm, well…I didn’t really think you had a stick up your ass,” Leilani responded, smirking again. He just thought that Shi Shu was nervous or prudish, and that was okay. Leilani would wait forever for him to be ready.And then, to blow all the kissing and sitting in his lap out of the water, Shi Shu confessed his love for him again. Leilani didn’t feel embarrassed, or shy after hearing that. He didn’t even truly need to hear it, though it was certainly nice. He knew that Shi Shu loved him. Shi Shu wouldn’t let him do half the things he did if he didn’t. Leilani didn’t need to hear Shi Shu saying it out loud, but the memory had cemented itself into his brain regardless. Shi Shu loved him — truly and honestly loved him, and Leilani would never let him forget it. He would do everything he could to make Shi Shu love him even more.
“Eh?” Leilani stared as his hand was brought up and placed atop Shi Shu’s horns. He looked between Shi Shu and his hand, a bit concerned. He knew that, for some reason, touching his horns was a very private thing. Shi Shu didn’t look exactly comfortable with it — likely because it was all very new to him — but, he insisted he wanted him to.
Leilani had trouble moving forward with Shi Shu because he wanted clear and obvious consent. Their past had been so complicated, and Shi Shu had been through so much and he’d been raised completely differently. Leilani didn’t want to overstep his bounds and do something that made him uncomfortable. Each time Shi Shu told him no more, Leilani listened. He would always respect whatever lines Shi Shu drew.
Now, though, he felt as if those lines had been erased, and new ones were popping up — the problem was that he didn’t know where the new ones were. How far could he go? And, on top of that, was Shi Shu really okay doing these things?
“I don’t want you to feel pressured,” Leilani said, tracing a finger over the soft velvety horn. They had grown almost an inch since Shi Shu had moved here. “Just because I lost my memories of you…doesn’t mean we have to rush and do everything right now — right away.” Though, of course, he certainly wouldn’t mind that.
Shi Shu had probably spent the last 72 hours doing a lot of thinking, and doing even more missing. Shi Shu had missed him deeply, and Leilani didn’t want him agreeing to all of this simply because he’d been scared he’d never see him again.
“I…want you to want to be with me like that,” Leilani said, following a slight curve in the horn with his fingertip. “I don’t want us to be together…because you’re scared. I want us to be together because you want to be.”They both deserved that. They deserved to be with each other naturally, in a way that made them both comfortable. Leilani would always provide that, no matter what. Their emotional needs would always come before their physical needs, he was sure. If Shi Shu wasn’t ready, he wouldn’t push him, simply because he was afraid of “what ifs.”
This was a long, deep and very serious conversation that had been long overdue—one that they should have had before anything else, considering the difficult nature of their relationship, without even getting started on Shi Shu’s inability to voice his thoughts without nearly self-combuting—, but Shi Shu had just had more than enough time to think about his answers and the points that he had underlined for extra emphasis…
If only Leilani didn’t pick that precise moment to torment him.
Shi Shu tried to open his mouth to respond, only to quickly close it to avoid letting out the thoroughly embarrassing noise that tried to gather in the back of his throat when Leilani traced a finger across his horn, the motion slow and gentle, yet it felt nearly electrifying, like tiny, delightful zaps of electricity running down his spine, making his legs twitch slightly around Leilani.
He probably wasn’t even doing it on purpose, after all, Shi Shu had never truly clarified why he didn’t like having his horns touched, only awkwardly describing it as ‘intimate’ without further clarifications. Leilani probably had no idea that he was rendering him basically useless with each gentle touch, reducing Shi Shu to a pile of flustered warm and slightly turned on goo.And the worst part was; he was still going! Still talking, trying to have a truly important and serious conversation, while still stroking his horn, tracing his finger over the tip, unaware that Shi Shu was edging towards a desperate whimper and a few strokes away from either pinning him down to the bed, or flying out the window from sheer embarrassment.
Squeezing his eyes shut as he fought back against a full-body shiver, Shi Shu finally gave up and gave in, embarrassment winning as he quickly ducked his head to hide it in the crook of Leilani’s neck, his face burning like a furnace compared to Leilani’s own temperature.
“N-Nuan nan, I’ll happily answer to all of your questions, b-but—” Shi Shu took a deep breath, desperately gathering as much self-control as he could possibly manage. “P-Perhaps have some mercy on me and don’t do that, at the least not when you expect me to answer?” He nearly pleaded, his pointed ears still pink and laying flat against the side of his head as he coaxed himself into straightening up—no hiding, he promised that he wouldn’t hide anymore, goddammit—, his face red as he reached up to gently grasp Leilani’s wrist, not pulling it away from his horns, just holding it still.“It’s….hard to concentrate. When you do that.” Shi Shu admitted in a tiny, meek little voice that sounded almost as if it had to be forcefully dragged out of the depths of his throat, still dodging eye contact as he spoke—he had to allow him that much! Heavens, he was sitting on his lap, letting him touch his horns; this was already one hell of a jump in their relationship, at the very least Leilani had to let him save some face!
Clearing his throat, Shi Shu dropped his attention down on Leilani’s necklaces instead, fiddling with the beads to keep himself distracted from the buzzing sensation still running through his body. “It’s not …it’s not about feeling pressured or obligated to move forward, I just…” He gesticulated wordlessly for a moment, growing more and more flustered with each failed attempt to convey his message.
“You…I…uhm…well, you see, uh—OH! You know sword surfing? That thing that A-Guang does occasionally, where he flies on his sword like your people ‘fly’ on the waves?” Shi Shu asked, perking up slightly despite the…confusing and abrupt (to say the least) change of subject. “In Ban Zi Zhen, it’s a very common skill, a sport, but it’s still very scary to everyone at the beginning. Even if you spend years knowing that you’ll have to try it out, eventually, that doesn’t stop you from feeling nervous all the way until the day you’re placed on top of a sword, hovering several feet off the ground.”Gently, Shi Shu took Leilani’s hands in his again, and laced their fingers together. “That’s…how I feel about most things, in our relationship. You can ask me ‘are you ready?’ as many times as you want, and the answer will probably be ‘no’ or ‘I don’t know’, because no matter how many times you visualize it in your head, nothing can really brace you for the fact that you’re about to step onto a flying sword, with a terrifyingly high chance of failing and falling repeatedly, making a fool of yourself over and over again before you can get it right.” Shi Shu mumbled, pinking again—maybe a sword wasn’t the best metaphor for these circumstances, but what else was he supposed to say or do?! Actually blurt out ‘I’m scared that I’ll be so bad at it that I’ll embarrass us both into going celibate for the rest of our lives!’
“That’s why….it’s not that I’m forcing myself to do anything, it’s just that…if I keep waiting for the day that I feel ‘ready’, I don’t know how many decades or even centuries we would have to wait.” Shi Shu explained, thumbs tracing over Leilani’s knuckles, following the up-and-down pattern at a heartbeat’s pace.
“….After all, it’s because of the fear of falling that I never actually learned how to fly on a sword!” He added, giggling nervously under his breath.Leilani expected that touching Shi Shu’s horns would give him some kind of pleasurable feelings, but the extent to which Shi Shu seemed to feel these things was far greater than he thought. He even had to stop his hand to speak.
Leilani thought it would be similar to giving him a back rub or combing his hair. These were intimate, pleasurable things, but they typically didn’t render a man completely useless. The one thing he could think of that might bring that amount of…feeling to someone was a lot different from touching the top of someone’s head. There was no way that this could be equal to touching Shi Shu between the legs, right? Was it the case even for horns as big as Hua’s? What on earth happened when she accidentally brushed them against a low hanging tree branch?!
Typically he wore his emotions on his sleeve, and so he was grateful that Shi Shu had aggressively and abruptly changed subjects before he could let those thoughts sink in. He took his hands into his own, too, thank goodness, because otherwise he might just sit there staring, trying to make sense of what, exactly, he’d been given permission to do.
Surprisingly, Shi Shu’s analogy came back around and Leilani understood. He understood it completely. There was so much in the world that was scary and new and who knew what would happen with some of those things. Trying things that were out of the norm was absolutely terrifying — he was right there with Shi Shu. But, it seemed that Shi Shu was finally starting to understand part of it. It wasn’t really about being ready to do something — it was about wanting to do it anyway, even if he was scared.
“Well…you don’t have to be worried about falling if I’m here to catch you,” Leilani said, his smile warm. And he would always catch Shi Shu when he fell, because he knew that Shi Shu would catch him, too.
“And maybe we’ll trip, or fall, or make fools of ourselves, but it doesn’t really matter if it’s just the two of us. I’ve never once been afraid of looking like a fool in front of you — I look like a fool in front of you almost every day,” Leilani said, poking a little fun at himself. Everyone knew that Shi Shu was the brains behind their political relationship, and Leilani almost always deferred the more complicated questions to him, even if it made him look foolish or like he didn’t know how to manage his own kingdom. Even outside of politics, Leilani was willing to make a fool of himself to make Shi Shu happy or to make him look good.
“It’s okay to feel foolish and silly and everything else because neither of us know what’s going on. We’ll just…get there together,” Leilani said, leaning forward and pressing their lips together again.
Everything in his life was done for Shi Shu, and Shi Shu for him. They were just evening out the scales, agreeing to a little more, moving just a little further.
He parted their lips and pressed their foreheads together, wanting to stay as close as possible.
“Don’t tell me to stop unless you really mean it, then,” Leilani said. “I meant everything I said over the last few days — if this is what you want, I won’t make you wait.”
His eyes were hungry, his hands running a lazy path up and down Shi Shu’s spine. It was always hard to resist Shi Shu, but he did as he was told. He stopped when Shi Shu asked, withdrew when he seemed too nervous. He never wanted him to feel pressured and uncomfortable. But maybe this was like diving into cold water on a hot summer day — you just had to jump in before you changed your mind.
Suddenly Husbands
Leilani was going to be the death of him. That wasn’t exactly new to him, but Shi Shu had never thought that he would expire in this particular setting; with his husband straddling his lap, with his cock in his hands and his own cum staining his thighs.
His ears burned, eyes casting downwards with shame—not that doing that would do anything to save his dignity, since it only meant that now he had no other choice but watch his own hand stroking Leilani in languid motions—, and he nearly ducked his head to smother an embarrassed whimper on his chest.
He couldn’t really scold him, though, could he? How hypocrite of him would that be, given how there was no way that Leilani missed the way that he twitched against his leg when he said that particular choice of words.Ah, he was so weak, so damn weak for Leilani—always was, regardless of whether it was a pile of work growing suspiciously small despite Leilani’s slug-like speed, skinned loquats hand-fed to a spoiled but lovely mouth, or the hungry, desperate plea to take or be taken— and there was no shame in that, not when he had him on his lap, more disheveled and desperate than he’d ever seen him, and Shi Shu wanted to give him everything and more, so turned on and smitten with the rosy tint that darkened his cheeks, his desperate gasps, the feeling of his muscles drawing taunt with each roll of his hips…
Leilani could have asked to go for three rounds in a go, and Shi Shu would have found a way, magical or not, to get it up over and over again, just for him.
Muffling his rapid breaths in the crook of Leilani’s neck, Shi Shu muffled a whine when he felt the unmistakable feeling of his cheek brushing across his horn, rolling his hips so hard against him that his own erection stroked across Leilani’s. “Just…just give me a second to think. I need…I need to think.” Shi Shu whispered, mouthing the words against the slick and warm skin of his neck.
In his head, Shi Shu had always imagined himself on the receiving end. Maybe it was because he’d always be a meek and submissive little thing in bed, or more likely even, because the Elders had always reinforced that he had to take a more feminine role in their relationship—the pretty spouse that would play instruments for his husband, always pale and delicate, something meant to sit still and look pretty.
And….well, Shi Shu certainly wouldn’t have minded being the one on the receiving end—especially if it implied Leilani towering above him like before, staring down at him like he wanted to eat him up—but on the other hand…Shaking himself out of his thoughts for a moment, Shi Shu glanced down at the erection twitching in his grip. He looked pretty much on edge but, he did say that he would last, didn’t he? And not only would it be terribly unfair if they ended this without him reciprocating Leilani’s previous favors, but also, was it not selfish of him, to just leave Leilani hanging while he pondered on the pros and cons of all the options?
So, smoothing his free hand across the arch of his husband’s back before settling it back on his hip, Shi Shu pressed another kiss to his shoulder, and allowed himself just a few moments to stew on his own embarrassment, before he finally leaned back, putting some distance between them again. “I’ll…I’ll keep you distracted while I think!” Shi Shu promised, face red as it could physically be, but eyes determined.He gave Leilani no time to wonder about which distraction he would provide him with; leaning forwards, Shi Shu placed a kiss on his other shoulder, and then lower, slowly planting shy, fluttery kisses all over his chest, sternum, over the dip of his abs, around his bellybutton, and finally, his navel, where his chin bumped lightly against Leilani’s erection, putting his trail of kisses to a halt.
….It was now or never! If Leilani could do it (and so enthusiastically too), then Shi Shu could provide him with such service as well!
Taking a long, deep breath, Shi Shu quickly went through all of his mental notes regarding this subject—plus some added tips from what he’d felt and saw earlier—, and after a moment of hesitation, stuck his tongue out and slowly swirled it around the tip, tracing the ridges, the thick vein of his underside, getting himself acquainted with this still-new and unfamiliar territory. …
It didn’t taste very good, quite honestly, Shi Shu felt that most of the books he’d read had exaggerated quite greatly—he still mentally winced thinking about certain choice of words such as ‘love juice’ or ‘honey seed’—but it was tolerable enough, and this wasn’t about him now, was it? Heavens, Leilani had swallowed a mouthful of him; Shi Shu could handle a little taste of salty bitterness!Gradually growing bolder, Shi Shu attempted to take Leilani into his mouth…and took no longer than 5 seconds to promptly choke on it.
“I’m fine I’m fine! I-I think I went a bit too fast…” Shi Shu mumbled sheepishly, embarrassment crawling up his face as he finished coughing, rubbing two fingers across his throat before dipping his head down one more time, taking him in more gradually this time.
It was an…..awkward descent; mostly because Leilani was far more ‘girthy’ than he was, forcing Shi Shu to be very careful as to not choke a second time. Determined to not disappoint, though, Shi Shu focused on things that he himself had found quite pleasurable back when it was his turn; he stroked the inches that he couldn’t take into his mouth with his fingers, swirled his tongue around the tip whenever he came up for air, dipping his tongue in the slit despite the saltiness, and when he went down, he tried to push himself a little further, taking him a little deeper, until his eyes teared up from the sheer pressure.His hair, though, not for the first time, revealed itself to be quite more bothersome than it was truly worth it, constantly sliding off his shoulders, gluing itself to their sticky bodies and, on a few mortifying occasions, nearly getting in his mouth while he went down on Leilani. Frustrated over the constant interruptions, Shi Shu suddenly took one of Leilani’s hands and, quickly gathering most of his hair in a bundled mess, guided that hand to it, curling his fingers firmly around his strands and giving it a meaningful squeeze to keep him from revealing it.
With the hair issue taken care of, and Leilani’s successfully distracted, Shi Shu could finally give the main issue some thought; who would be on the receiving end?
Again, first instinctive answer was, himself. And Shi Shu might have stuck to that answer, if it wasn’t for a teeny tiny little detail…
A ‘teeny tiny detail’ that bumped against the back of his throat, making him grunt and squeeze his eyes shut around another batch of tears. Shi Shu had never done anything with his…backdoor, but as far as he was concerned, his mouth stretched open far more easily than that did, and yet, his jaw already felt sore, his mouth too full, and he was pretty sure that he would still feel the bulge of Leilani’s cock in his throat when he woke up tomorrow. Imagining that sort of pressure down there, did things to Shi Shu’s nerves, and this time not the good type of things.
…But on the other hand—he mentally whimpered, another wave of embarrassment washing over him—would…would he even know what to do, on the giving end?! Lelani seemed genuinely interested in either of the available options, and Shi Shu trusted his word but…oh gods, what if he messed up, what if he hurt Leilani, what if—
No more what ifs!—Scolded the frustrated and fed-up part of his brain that rapped it’s metaphorical fan across his head multiple times. He’d promised himself that he would do this again, that he wouldn’t hesitate over simple questions because of his imaginary ‘what ifs’.
He had a cock nearly shoved down his throat, he could damn well ask his husband if he would be willing to take one up his bottom!Pulling out with a strangled gasp, Shi Shu finally straightened his back, popping it back into place as he lifted his head to look up at Leilani. His face was blotched red, tears ran down his face from exertion, and he sounded as if he’d been holding his breath underwater all this time, but his gaze was bright and determined.
“Nuan nan, I….don’t think I’m quite ready to take your….your masculinity, it’s uh…a bit intimidating for a specific part of my body right now.” He admitted, sheepishness bleeding into his confidence in a matter of seconds, only to be promptly shoved back as another glimmer of determination flashed through his eyes.“But! It’s okay! See, I read about this too; tomorrow, I can take a long, warm bath; I read that it makes the body loose and much more flexible! In fact, did you know that in some countries, couples have their first time in a bathtub, exactly to ease the intrusion? Oh we could try that too…it certainly would help with the clean up, wouldn’t it?” Shi Shu pointed out, split between being thoroughly embarrassed over the subject, while over-enthusiastic in the familiar way that he always was over anything that he read and that he wanted to try out.
Of course Shi Shu needed to think about it. He was probably writing a list of pros and cons in his head right now, and Leilani laughed, just enjoying the moment. The thing was, as it usually was with Leilani, he was just happy to be here.
Apparently needing longer than a few seconds to think, Shi Shu shifted their positions and settled himself between his legs, creating quite a picture for Leilani. He looked quite hungrily, watching as Shi Shu went down on him. When he choked, he was torn between alarm and laughing. The whole thing was just painfully awkward and weird, but Leilani was still just happy, turned on, and living a life that he had thought wouldn’t happen for several years at least.
Shi Shu seemed to be okay, though, and he continued, pumping his shaft and pushing his mouth down on it. Leilani could hardly see him around his hair, but the sight was so dumbfounding that he needed to be guided to push the hair out of his face. He couldn’t even manage a thought like that — keep Shi Shu’s hair out of his face. How could he not even focus on such a thing.
He twirled his fingers around his hair, hoping that he wasn’t pulling too hard. Was this what Shi Shu had felt like? Like his chest was too tight and like he couldn’t breathe, and he couldn’t think. How in the hell was Shi Shu managing to think about how they were going to have sex?
The only thing Leilani could think about was how he was going to just…not cum right now. His hips twitched, his fingernails scraped against his scalp, his body felt tight and his thighs shook with the effort to restrain himself.
He tilted his head back and shut his eyes tight, biting down so hard on his bottom lip he was sure it would be bruised. This wasn’t good.
No, it was good, and that was the problem.
He had no idea if Shi Shu was actually good at this, or if he’d been any good at it, but it was far better than his own hand.
A sharp gasp fell from his lips as Shi Shu pulled away from his cock, leaving him exposed to the cold air. Shi Shu had apparently come to a decision, his face showing the stress of his efforts.
Somehow, even that was sexy.
He ran his fingers through his hair, slowly loosening up the grip he had on it. He would have to brush it for three hours to make up for the damage.
“The bath?”
Leilani ran his hands over Shi Shu’s chest and shoulders, thinking. He didn’t mind being on the bottom — but he was new to this, too.
Wait.
“You want to do this again tomorrow?” Leilani grinned, a laugh on his lips. “Geez! Who are you and what have you done with Shi Shu? What have you done with my husband that gets shy when I touch his hip? And now you’re saying you want to have sex…in the bath?”
He had always imagined Shi Shu to be a very traditional man, who would want very basic sex, one on top of the other in bed, but if Shi Shu wanted a warm bath to fuck in…
He rolled off the bed and scooped Shi Shu up in his arms, hands underneath his thighs.
He had no idea what it would feel like to be…penetrated, but if a bath would make it easier, if there was a way to simplify this, then he would do it.
He carried Shi Shu to the bathroom and sat him on the counter, pressing kisses to his collarbone and neck as he set him down.
“Let’s try it,” he said, turning the water on in the bath. He was desperately thankful for the time to calm himself down, anyway. It gave him a moment to breathe and recover and calm down his racing heart.
While the bath filled, Leilani made sure to fill Shi Shu’s attentions, teasing his horns with his fingertips, running his thumb over the top of his erection, doing whatever he could to fuel his arousal and keep him interested.
Truly, Leilani was filled with nerves. He had no idea what was going to come next, but he was equal parts terrified and excited.
With the bath filled, he took Shi Shu by the hand and stepped into the water. The bath was big enough for several people, with spots to sit around the edge — or, he thought with no lack of excitement, spots to kneel.
The flow had been shifted a bit, and now that they had gotten to this point — two naked, erect men, standing in a mostly full, steaming bath, Leilani finally felt the embarrassment creep in.
“Okay, shishu,” Leilani said, his tone still playful despite his anxiety. How could he not be anxious?!
“What do we do? I have, um…oils and, you know…that sort of thing.” He hadn’t done any sort of preparation for this, figuring it would come naturally. To some degree, he knew what to do. He knew that he would slick Shi Shu’s cock, and they would fit it inside of him, but the whole process seemed, well, daunting. Shi Shu was only a bit smaller than him — would it even fit?
“I just kind of want to…do it, but I have a feeling that if I suggest that for real, you’ll pull a fan out of somewhere and whack me in the head.”
Shi Shu blinked, looking confused and innocent in a way that he had no right to be, not after all that he’d done. Was…that not normal? He was under the impression that most couples usually went at it plenty times a week, or at the least that’s what the books had implied—!
Before Shi Shu could even begin to formulate his questions out loud, though, Leilani suddenly hoisted him up in his arms, carrying him in the most shameless and embarrassing fashion, making Shi Shu flush all the way up to his horns as he felt his erection rub against his stomach, while another poked at his behind. “W-Wait, I didn’t say that we have to do it right now! It’s just what it said on the books—!” But all of his flustered babble was useless, and soon enough, Shi Shu could say nothing at all.
He found himself sitting on the counter in the bathroom, still spluttering while Leilani showered him with kisses, reducing him back to his shaky gelatin state as he harassed his horns again and kept tormenting his already straining erection, clearly not happy to be working overtime but still giving it’s best.
By the time the bath was ready, Shi Shu was already too riled up to complain as he was tugged into the bathtub, his legs slightly shaky as he stepped inside…
….There….really was no way to make this not-awkward. In fact, nothing could be not-awkward when two men stood still with two erect members bobbing in the air, but their inexperience only made it worst, somehow!
Thankfully, ah Leilani always knew what to say at the right time! And thanks to his idiotic comment, Shi Shu was able to snap out of his embarrassment just before it became too overwhelming, his eyes narrowing as he gave one of Leilani’s braids a firm tug. “Oh I won’t need a fan to punish you if you dare to blurt out such an idiotic idea! I’ll headbutt you, like A-Guang has taught me, and then we’ll both suffer through the headache.” He scoffed, but he was no Ji Guang, his temper could hardly survive three seconds before it melted away, replaced by soft kisses as he guided him to sit down, offering himself as a seat for him again.
Sighing contentedly as they sunk into the hot water, Shi Shu held Leilani close, squeezing him in his arms as if he was the one who was about to have something shoved up his ass.
“Ah….I must admit that I lack…experience on this particular subject but, I do know the steps for the proper preparation.” He admitted from where he was tucked in the crook of Leilani’s neck, and after a moment of hesitation, reached out of the water and blindly pawed at the counter behind them.
Once he grew impatient over his failed attempts to find what he needed, Shi Shu just flicked his hand, and tugged on his own energy reserves with a quick ‘Find Me’ spell singing through his veins.
….The Elders would surely expire if they ever found out how he was putting his skills to use, but thankfully, Shi Shu was just turned on enough to not care.
For now.
In no time, the right vial just floated over to his hand, it’s weight feeling weirdly intimidating on his palm despite it’s innocent exterior. Uncorking it with shaky hands, Shi Shu carefully drizzled some onto his hand and, with a renewed thick sense of awkwardness that could only be accomplished with the slick squelch of oil being spread across his fingers, almost like foreshadowing of what was about to come, Shi Shu finally brought his hand down, between Leilani’s legs.
“Pull yourself out of the water, nuan nan, just a little bit…” Shi Shu instructed him gently, flushed all the way up to his horns as he placed a hand on Leilani’s hip to guide him into a kneeling position that kept his….essential parts just right above the water.
“I’ve never done this before…n-not even to myself so…please, do tell me if it hurts or if it feels wrong in any way.” Shi Shu said, shakily feeling his way down Leilani’s erection, tracing over his balls and further down, leaving a trail of oil behind everywhere he touched, until he reached the stiff little entrance that he was meant to, somehow, fit into.
Mentally running through the steps in his head, Shi Shu gently coaxed Leilani to relax, tracing a fingertip around his entrance, drawing slick little circles until he felt it loosen up.
Surprisingly enough, it seemed like the tip from the book was accurate; while still worryingly small, when Shi Shu pressed a lubed up thumb against it, he was shocked to find it far more relaxed and loose than he’d expected.
“I’m going to….start sliding it in, okay?” Shi Shu whispered on his ear, planting kisses all over his shoulders and neck to, hopefully, keep his distracted as he slowly wormed the first finger into him, nearly gasping out loud when it was practically swallowed in.
…Oh god, they were actually doing this. It was tight, overwhelmingly hot, and Shi Shu would be lucky if he survived three seconds in that tight heat without coming undone completely!
Slowly, carefully, Shi Shu began to slide his finger out, and then slowly slid it back in, repeating the motion over and over again, until he felt the pressure around his finger becoming just comfortable enough for him to push in and out at ease.
There was just no…getting around the darn sounds though. No matter how slow or careful Shi Shu was, his ears were still tormented through the entire procedure, each slide and push filling the bathroom with the absolutely filthy sound of wet fingers sliding into an equally well-oiled up entrance.
Honestly, Shi Shu wasn’t even sure at this point if he would survive until the main event!
But eventually, even though it stressed him out just to think about it, Shi Shu had to introduce the second guest to Leilani’s entrance, and as expected, they went back to the awkward stage of slowly worming in and out, while his poor husband tried to adjust to the new stretch. Despite having much thinner fingers than Leilani, Shi Shu couldn’t help but almost regret suggesting their current roles; he would rather not sit all day next time, than to make Leilani go through this again.
“Nuan nan, I need you to relax a little more.” Shi Shu murmured against his jaw, distractedly pulling him into a kiss….and was abruptly reminded of what, exactly, had been in Leilani’s mouth before, when the sharp tang of bitter salt of his own cum coated his tongue.
Startled by his sudden—and somewhat mortifying—realization, Shi Shu accidentally twitched his fingers inside Leilani, pushing right into a strange and fleshy bump in his walls. “A-Ah sorry!” Shi Shu blurted out, and proceeded to stroke that spot even more, as if attempting to soothe an aggravated area.
Suddenly Husbands
Leilani was going to be the death of him. That wasn’t exactly new to him, but Shi Shu had never thought that he would expire in this particular setting; with his husband straddling his lap, with his cock in his hands and his own cum staining his thighs.
His ears burned, eyes casting downwards with shame—not that doing that would do anything to save his dignity, since it only meant that now he had no other choice but watch his own hand stroking Leilani in languid motions—, and he nearly ducked his head to smother an embarrassed whimper on his chest.
He couldn’t really scold him, though, could he? How hypocrite of him would that be, given how there was no way that Leilani missed the way that he twitched against his leg when he said that particular choice of words.Ah, he was so weak, so damn weak for Leilani—always was, regardless of whether it was a pile of work growing suspiciously small despite Leilani’s slug-like speed, skinned loquats hand-fed to a spoiled but lovely mouth, or the hungry, desperate plea to take or be taken— and there was no shame in that, not when he had him on his lap, more disheveled and desperate than he’d ever seen him, and Shi Shu wanted to give him everything and more, so turned on and smitten with the rosy tint that darkened his cheeks, his desperate gasps, the feeling of his muscles drawing taunt with each roll of his hips…
Leilani could have asked to go for three rounds in a go, and Shi Shu would have found a way, magical or not, to get it up over and over again, just for him.
Muffling his rapid breaths in the crook of Leilani’s neck, Shi Shu muffled a whine when he felt the unmistakable feeling of his cheek brushing across his horn, rolling his hips so hard against him that his own erection stroked across Leilani’s. “Just…just give me a second to think. I need…I need to think.” Shi Shu whispered, mouthing the words against the slick and warm skin of his neck.
In his head, Shi Shu had always imagined himself on the receiving end. Maybe it was because he’d always be a meek and submissive little thing in bed, or more likely even, because the Elders had always reinforced that he had to take a more feminine role in their relationship—the pretty spouse that would play instruments for his husband, always pale and delicate, something meant to sit still and look pretty.
And….well, Shi Shu certainly wouldn’t have minded being the one on the receiving end—especially if it implied Leilani towering above him like before, staring down at him like he wanted to eat him up—but on the other hand…Shaking himself out of his thoughts for a moment, Shi Shu glanced down at the erection twitching in his grip. He looked pretty much on edge but, he did say that he would last, didn’t he? And not only would it be terribly unfair if they ended this without him reciprocating Leilani’s previous favors, but also, was it not selfish of him, to just leave Leilani hanging while he pondered on the pros and cons of all the options?
So, smoothing his free hand across the arch of his husband’s back before settling it back on his hip, Shi Shu pressed another kiss to his shoulder, and allowed himself just a few moments to stew on his own embarrassment, before he finally leaned back, putting some distance between them again. “I’ll…I’ll keep you distracted while I think!” Shi Shu promised, face red as it could physically be, but eyes determined.He gave Leilani no time to wonder about which distraction he would provide him with; leaning forwards, Shi Shu placed a kiss on his other shoulder, and then lower, slowly planting shy, fluttery kisses all over his chest, sternum, over the dip of his abs, around his bellybutton, and finally, his navel, where his chin bumped lightly against Leilani’s erection, putting his trail of kisses to a halt.
….It was now or never! If Leilani could do it (and so enthusiastically too), then Shi Shu could provide him with such service as well!
Taking a long, deep breath, Shi Shu quickly went through all of his mental notes regarding this subject—plus some added tips from what he’d felt and saw earlier—, and after a moment of hesitation, stuck his tongue out and slowly swirled it around the tip, tracing the ridges, the thick vein of his underside, getting himself acquainted with this still-new and unfamiliar territory. …
It didn’t taste very good, quite honestly, Shi Shu felt that most of the books he’d read had exaggerated quite greatly—he still mentally winced thinking about certain choice of words such as ‘love juice’ or ‘honey seed’—but it was tolerable enough, and this wasn’t about him now, was it? Heavens, Leilani had swallowed a mouthful of him; Shi Shu could handle a little taste of salty bitterness!Gradually growing bolder, Shi Shu attempted to take Leilani into his mouth…and took no longer than 5 seconds to promptly choke on it.
“I’m fine I’m fine! I-I think I went a bit too fast…” Shi Shu mumbled sheepishly, embarrassment crawling up his face as he finished coughing, rubbing two fingers across his throat before dipping his head down one more time, taking him in more gradually this time.
It was an…..awkward descent; mostly because Leilani was far more ‘girthy’ than he was, forcing Shi Shu to be very careful as to not choke a second time. Determined to not disappoint, though, Shi Shu focused on things that he himself had found quite pleasurable back when it was his turn; he stroked the inches that he couldn’t take into his mouth with his fingers, swirled his tongue around the tip whenever he came up for air, dipping his tongue in the slit despite the saltiness, and when he went down, he tried to push himself a little further, taking him a little deeper, until his eyes teared up from the sheer pressure.His hair, though, not for the first time, revealed itself to be quite more bothersome than it was truly worth it, constantly sliding off his shoulders, gluing itself to their sticky bodies and, on a few mortifying occasions, nearly getting in his mouth while he went down on Leilani. Frustrated over the constant interruptions, Shi Shu suddenly took one of Leilani’s hands and, quickly gathering most of his hair in a bundled mess, guided that hand to it, curling his fingers firmly around his strands and giving it a meaningful squeeze to keep him from revealing it.
With the hair issue taken care of, and Leilani’s successfully distracted, Shi Shu could finally give the main issue some thought; who would be on the receiving end?
Again, first instinctive answer was, himself. And Shi Shu might have stuck to that answer, if it wasn’t for a teeny tiny little detail…
A ‘teeny tiny detail’ that bumped against the back of his throat, making him grunt and squeeze his eyes shut around another batch of tears. Shi Shu had never done anything with his…backdoor, but as far as he was concerned, his mouth stretched open far more easily than that did, and yet, his jaw already felt sore, his mouth too full, and he was pretty sure that he would still feel the bulge of Leilani’s cock in his throat when he woke up tomorrow. Imagining that sort of pressure down there, did things to Shi Shu’s nerves, and this time not the good type of things.
…But on the other hand—he mentally whimpered, another wave of embarrassment washing over him—would…would he even know what to do, on the giving end?! Lelani seemed genuinely interested in either of the available options, and Shi Shu trusted his word but…oh gods, what if he messed up, what if he hurt Leilani, what if—
No more what ifs!—Scolded the frustrated and fed-up part of his brain that rapped it’s metaphorical fan across his head multiple times. He’d promised himself that he would do this again, that he wouldn’t hesitate over simple questions because of his imaginary ‘what ifs’.
He had a cock nearly shoved down his throat, he could damn well ask his husband if he would be willing to take one up his bottom!Pulling out with a strangled gasp, Shi Shu finally straightened his back, popping it back into place as he lifted his head to look up at Leilani. His face was blotched red, tears ran down his face from exertion, and he sounded as if he’d been holding his breath underwater all this time, but his gaze was bright and determined.
“Nuan nan, I….don’t think I’m quite ready to take your….your masculinity, it’s uh…a bit intimidating for a specific part of my body right now.” He admitted, sheepishness bleeding into his confidence in a matter of seconds, only to be promptly shoved back as another glimmer of determination flashed through his eyes.“But! It’s okay! See, I read about this too; tomorrow, I can take a long, warm bath; I read that it makes the body loose and much more flexible! In fact, did you know that in some countries, couples have their first time in a bathtub, exactly to ease the intrusion? Oh we could try that too…it certainly would help with the clean up, wouldn’t it?” Shi Shu pointed out, split between being thoroughly embarrassed over the subject, while over-enthusiastic in the familiar way that he always was over anything that he read and that he wanted to try out.
Shameless? Was Shi Shu really going to say that wanting to admire his body was shameless when they were doing, well, this? He didn’t know how far they would go — if they would go all the way — but, for someone who wouldn’t even look at his bare chest a month or so ago, this was far more shameless than anything else.
Shi Shu pulled his hands free of his sleeves, giving Leilani a perfect glimpse of his long arms, the elegant bend of his elbow and curve of his shoulder. Being in Pali Kai had been good for Shi Shu. He could see a bit of a tan line around his collarbone, and he’d gained weight back from his time imprisoned, finally looking less skeletal. Shi Shu always looked elegant and beautiful, though when he first arrived, Leilani had been filled with worry for his health. Now, though, there were no concerns at all. Shi Shu was probably healthier now than he’d ever been in Ban Zi Zhen.He laid still, hands resting casually on Shi Shu’s hips as his hands wandered over his body, touching every inch of exposed skin that he could. He would lay here for as long as Shi Shu needed to explore, inhaling long and deep while his hands traced lower, his knee pushing against his groin.
And then it was over, Shi Shu sitting up and looking like he had just made a grand discovery — because he had. He, apparently, remembered how sex was supposed to work. He laughed, but the laugh quickly gave way to a breathy moan as Shi Shu rode on top of him, grinding their hips together in a way that was absolutely delightful and also painfully slow. He had been craving this for so long, and now Shi Shu was walking through it like he needed to be taught what to do with the thing dangling between his legs.
“A-Shu,” Leilani said, barely managing to get his words out between the little gasps and giggles that threatened to jump out of his throat. He really didn’t want to laugh at Shi Shu’s attempt at sex coupled with a historical lesson on how most virgins apparently got off with their partners. It was incredible that they had even reached this point. Leilani loved that he got to be here, holding Shi Shu’s hips and leaning up into each slow grind against his lap. He was sure that, with enough time, he could have gotten off with just that alone.His husband, the man he loved for so long, the man he’d been attracted to for so long, was finally responding in kind. He wanted to do this.
“You’re a very smart man, and I love you…very much,” Leilani said, teasing his fingers a bit lower, pushing them under the folds of the fabric still bunched around Shi Shu’s hips, barely clinging on without the sash to hold it. He could see the soft curve of his thighs, and beneath the fabric he knew there was pale skin, soft, and perfectly touchable. He wondered what his skin would look like beneath his hand, grabbed tight while he rocked into him, or sucked him off, or any number of any lewd things.
“But…maybe we can save the sex education lecture…for afterwards?” Leilani asked, sliding one of his hands over Shi Shu’s thigh and just gently grazing his fingers over his crotch, where he could feel a small bulge forming, thanks to Shi Shu’s very important foreplay.
Leilani was already very turned on, heart pounding and body aching for more, swelling underneath the light fabric of his skirt and undergarments. The friction of their clothes and Shi Shu’s hips would get him where he wanted, but there was so much more they could do — so much more that he’d imagined each time he dreamed, or when he snuck out of bed early in the morning to work through a few issues before Shi Shu noticed. Leilani had been very careful about revealing his arousal around Shi Shu, staying in bed longer, heading to the bathroom when he thought Shi Shu wasn’t looking. His main goal this whole time had been to not make Shi Shu feel uncomfortable.“You said…you couldn’t really talk or…or listen when I was touching your horn,” Leilani said. “This is, mm…basically the same.”
He, after some debate, pushed a bit on Shi Shu’s hips and flipped their positions, now straddling him on the bed and taking control of the scenario. He took a moment to breathe and steady himself, though he felt he could have cum just from the sight of Shi Shu laying beneath him. His hair was splayed around him with no rhyme or reason, laying like silk over their sheets. His face was flushed, his body just the slightest bit pink, and his lips swollen from kissing.Sex looked good on him.
“I want to do something,” Leilani said, briefly treating Shi Shu to what he had been giving to him. He rubbed their hips together, slow and firm — deliberate. “If you don’t like it, or if I’m bad at it, you can tell me to stop and I will.”Though, he had a feeling that once he got started, Shi Shu wouldn’t want him to stop. Such was the nature of such things — once things were underway it was hard to stop them. He knew that from experience. But he had a feeling that Shi Shu might not. He’d been here for so long, but he never once saw him sneak away to the bathroom, or ask for a moment alone.
This was a lot of firsts for them both, and he hoped that they were good ones.
Months ago, Shi Shu could have stated, and quite genuinely too, that he didn’t quite understand the appeal of sex. He could…maybe understand that the objective was quite tempting, but the process hadn’t sounded all too appealing to him. The idea of sweaty bodies moving together, smearing body fluids all over each other, hadn’t been exactly alluring to him.
That Shi Shu, though, was a fool.
A poor, ignorant fool that had no idea that Leilani would look so delectable laying underneath him, waves and curls spread like a halo around his head, his smile pleased and eyes dark with lust as his strong, warm hands gripped his hips, fingers digging into his skin through the fabric…
O-Oh—Shi Shu’s heart stuttered in his chest, and the tiny little sounds that dragged out of Leilani’s wonderful mouth, with each motion of his hips, resonated deep in the pits of his stomach, making him feel warm and tingly in ways that he hadn’t felt….ever, actually.
Now that he thought about it, Shi Shu couldn’t recall arousal ever feeling this strong; sharp and deep, like a knife made out of sheer pleasure digging straight into his guts. And it only got better when Leilani returned the favor, hips twitching upwards to meet his, and with each motion, Shi Shu’s breath caught in his throat, little gasps that threatened to become embarrassing and desperate whimpers as the pleasure poured into him, like an unending fountain of wonderful sensations.And yet. It wasn’t enough, somehow.
It was like an itch, the type that constantly shifted around, never satisfied no matter what and it was, unfortunately, a sensation that Shi Shu was painfully familiar with.
After all, Ban Zi Zhen prided itself on their pristine principles, with a possibly unhealthy obsession with the concept of ‘purity’…and what a better way to put those principles to use, than to apply them to their own princes and princesses, and make a shining bright example out of them?As soon as he’d hit puberty, Shi Shu had earned the right to wear his hair up like an adult, his robes were replaced with bigger robed, with double the layers and with sleeves that dragged across the ground, and more importantly; he was made to sit down in front of an Elder, and spent a whole morning learning a lesson that would torture him for years to come.
Giving himself pleasure was not only a sin, but also strictly forbidden—they’d told him, forcing him to write that down 100 times, until he could nearly visualize it in the back of his eyelids— he had to save himself for his future spouse after all, and to grant himself such relief before the time came, wouldn’t just be terribly selfish but also thoroughly disrespectful. Without even getting started on how it showed his lack of patience and self-control, which would have been highly frown upon.But even Shi Shu, was only human. And his budding hormones hadn’t particularly cared about his self-imposed morals.
And yet still, every year, Shi Shu could have counted on one single hand, how many times he’d touched himself. Even that, though, was a long time ago.After all, war hardly provided the privacy and peace of mind necessary to accomplish the necessary…requirements to engage in such activities.
So, all things considered—Shi Shu reasoned, fighting back a whole-body shudder when Leilani’s hands found his bare legs, heart hammering away in his chest when they slid upwards, dangerously close to where his robes were bundled up around his hips, concealing the proof of how own perked up interest—it certainly made sense that he’d be extra responsive and, quite honestly, he felt that he deserved a pat in the back for handling this as well as he did! How many people out there could handle nearly three decades of celibacy?! Especially when his husband was—
Hard—the new train of thought slammed straight into the previous one, forcing it off it’s tracks as it completely consumed every space available of his entire brain, sparing nothing for the remains of his previous lingering thoughts. How had he missed it, heavens, he’d been so focused flipping through the mental pages of his mental encyclopedia that he’d failed to notice the obvious pressure jabbing at him.
But now that he did, Shi Shu couldn’t help but be hyperaware of it’s existence; every thrust and grind was now aimed with the single objective of testing the newly added element, his own arousal twitching underneath the bundled up layers hiding it with each tentative drag across it—And then a gasp startled out of him, startling him out of his thoughts again, as a hand grazed his crotch but didn’t linger there, offering absolutely no relief. Shi Shu’s cheeks burned so hard that they nearly stung, but unfortunately, shame did nothing to tame the fire in the pits of his stomach; if anything, he felt himself get even harder, seeking that pressure again but to no vain.
“I-I..I’m…” He what?! Even Shi Shu didn’t know, his brain too muddled with arousal to form a string of coherent thought, his thighs twitching slightly when Leilani slipped his hand underneath the pile of robes to stroke skin that had never seen the daylight.
Thankfully, Leilani didn’t give him too much time to stress over what he wanted to say, because the very next moment, the world around him spun around and Shi Shu found himself laying back against the bed, legs still on each side of Leilani’s hips, hair and robes disheveled around him, while Leilani hovered above him—
Shi Shu’s throat bobbed into a hard swallow before he could even help himself. This wasn’t fair, not the slightest bit; he’d thought that he liked having Leilani laying underneath him, but this was…well, it did things to Shi Shu. Things that made his concealed boner twitch and leak underneath his robes, his heartbeat strumming a frantic song across his veins as he stared up at Leilani through half-lidded eyes, watching his hair dangle in messy waves around him, taking in the smaller details like, the flushed bottom lip that he’d just sucked between his teeth moments before, the rare warm hue that colored his cheeks, the pure, raw hunger that dilated his eyes…The pressure of their hips connecting once again was completely unnecessary; Shi Shu was pretty sure that he was already leaning towards the edge just from laying underneath his husband like this, and maybe he was too pent up already, but he couldn’t help the way his back arched away from the bed with a gasp, when Leilani bucks harder, much firmer than his own previous tentative little back-and-forth motions.
He wasn’t going to last—Shi Shu suddenly realized, with amounting mortification, anther sharp gasp pushing out of his lungs with the next thrust.
“Y-Yes,” Shi Shu breathed out, struggling for a moment to gather enough saliva and sense into his mouth before he could upgrade to longer sentences. “I…you can do as you wish, but uh, fair warning?” He mumbled, nervously shifting his gaze away. “I…hm…haven’t done…anything in a…more or less, lets say, in the last 5 or so years…?” Shi Shu confessed, sheepishly, squeezing his eyes shut as if that would somehow save him some dignity. “I-I honestly don’t know how uh…how much I’m going to last, nuan nan…”
Leilani was given permission to do whatever he wanted, and that was almost scary. Shi Shu was like the entire ocean when Leilani was used to playing only in a puddle.
“That’s okay,” Leilani said, leaning down to press a kiss to Shi Shu’s cheek and then his lips. He didn’t care how long Shi Shu lasted, or if he didn’t even last a minute at all. The fact that he would be able to get him off was enough, and Leilani was reveling in that fact. He was being allowed to touch Shi Shu however he wanted.
To give Shi Shu that kind of untethered pleasure was, as far as he was concerned, the best belated birthday gift he could give him.
He slid backwards, positioning himself between Shi Shu’s legs and, cautiously, as if trying not to spook a baby deer in the woods, pushed the fabric of Shi Shu’s robes aside. As he’d suspected, Shi Shu was quite aroused, bulging against his underwear and even leaking through it. It was Leilani’s first time seeing such a thing. Sure, he had looked down at his own erection before, but this was someone else’s. How different could it be, though?
Somehow, even if it was exactly the same, it felt much more thrilling. This…was because of him. Shi Shu was hard because of him. He was turned on because of him.
He reached his hand out and rubbed his palm against the bulge, through the fabric, testing the waters. He avoided Shi Shu’s gaze at first — not sure if he could bring himself to look at someone while he was doing this. But then, he wanted to see how he looked. He wanted to see if he was reacting the right ways — if he was doing a good job.
So, with red cheeks, he chanced a glance up at Shi Shu.
He imagined they both looked about the same — breathless and twitching, faces red with lust and embarrassment. It was beautiful.
Carefully, slowly, he slid his fingertips beneath the waist of Shi Shu’s underwear and began pulling it downward, careful not to drag it over his erection too hard. When his arousal sprung free, naked and dripping, Leilani felt butterflies tickling his stomach. They were really doing this. This was really happening.He helped Shi Shu’s ankles out from the holes of his undergarments, then kissed his way back up his legs, hands running over the soft, pale skin. His fingers trembled just slightly with nerves as he approached the object of his intent. He had touched himself plenty of times, sure, but sucked himself off? Never. That was impossible. He had no idea if he would be good at it or if it even mattered. Anything would probably feel good as long as he didn’t bite Shi Shu’s dick off…
He knelt between Shi Shu, his own erection neglected and pressed firmly against his underwear, begging for attention. He was thankful for his skirt to hide it from Shi Shu’s eyes — for now, anyway.
He took a short breath and reached one of his hands out, wrapping it carefully around Shi Shu’s length, running his thumb over the sensitive tip and smearing precum downwards, over the shaft. The simple action had himself throbbing, turned on by such a lewd sight. Gods, how he had craved this. How many nights had he laid awake praying that one day Shi Shu would want to lay with him? How many nights had he snuck away to touch himself and pretend it was Shi Shu’s hand. How many dreams had he had that involved this exact scenario — him leaning down between Shi Shu’s legs and sliding his mouth over his erection, all while keeping his eyes locked onto his face. He wanted to see every emotion, every ounce of embarrassment, nerves and pleasure. He wanted to witness it all. Maybe that made him a pervert, or maybe that made him a man who was sexually starved. He didn’t care. Every little gesture Shi Shu made sent thrills through his body.
Leilani balanced his weight on his knees and his forearm, which rested on Shi Shu’s upper thigh while he pushed his lips down over the shaft. He opened his mouth a little further and laid his tongue flat against the underside, taking in the taste of bitter and salt. His free hand, mean while, slipped between his own legs, applying consistent pressure to his erection, trying to sate it without pushing himself too far. His body begged for more and he refused to give it. Maybe he really was a pervert.
Still, he leaned down and pushed further, having to shut his eyes as he swallowed Shi Shu’s length as far as he could, leaving just enough room at the base for his hand to steady his hips and his erection. He pulled back and pushed in again, teasing his tongue around the tip each time he did. He wanted to hear Shi Shu moan. He wanted to feel him finish. He wanted to know what his trembling hips would feel like, what he would taste like, if he could cum just from this. Five years without doing anything — surely he wouldn’t last long.He picked up his ministrations, his mouth making lewd sounds against Shi Shu’s skin, his body pushing out little moans of its own as a new feeling or sight made him throb. He rubbed his other hand firmly between his legs, resisting the urge to buck against his palm and speed things up. Leilani would have his turn. He would have his moment. Shi Shu had spent the last three days without his husband. He’d feared he would never see him again.. He needed this. He deserved it. And Leilani would give it to him.
To say Shi Shu was nervous would be an understatement; his nerves were so on edge that he feared that he might still be shaking for days after this.
From a rational level, Shi Shu was well aware of the list of possibilities of what could possibly happen now, but it was one thing to know, and a whole different beast to experience it.He could have listen out loud 69 different positions and their benefits according to the gender of the participants, but in terms of experience, he was still sitting on stage zero!
And at this point, he knew damn well that he couldn’t fully trust his books to tell him the full truth; he’d read so many romances, read all sorts of lewd descriptions, but not a single one of of those stories could have possibly braced him for the sensation of another person’s breath and warmth in his mouth, the slippery feeling of a tongue that didn’t belong in his mouth, the way Leilani’s bottom lip always looked so flushed and swollen after he sucked on it and traced his tongue across it…If a kiss had felt so different from what he’d imagined, then Shi Shu could only wait in a mix of excitement and barely concealed nervousness, as his husband began his descent.
Staring pointedly at the ceiling, Shi Shu took a long deep breath—which then practically stuttered out of his chest when Leilani pushed the rest of his robes aside, baring him completely except for his underwear….which was doing a terrible job at concealing anything at this point, Shi Shu could tell that much without having to even look down—he could feel the strain of his cock trying to stretch the fabric, specially now that the weight of his robes was gone, leaving him pointedly aware of the wetness that he could feel gathering inside his underwear and oh god, it was probably seeping through the fabric, and Leilani was staring and there was no way that there wasn’t a massive stain on the front and Leilani was—
“M-hm!” Shi Shu whimpered, startling at the sudden contact, instinctively looking down and…and heavens, that was a terrible decision, because Leilani was already looking up at him, watching him with an intensity that should be straight up illegal, and his cheeks were so red, redder than Shi Shu had ever seen, and under any other circumstances, he might have reached down to cup that warm cheek in his hand, maybe pull him up to watch it more closely…
But! Maybe not when he had his hand pressed right against his boner!
Fingers hooked around his underwear just as his head snapped back to stare intensely at the ceiling, and if Shi Shu had felt bared before, then he wasn’t even sure how to process his own nakedness the moment his underwear slipped down his legs, leaving every single inch of his skin naked and exposed to Leilani’s eager gaze. And right there, standing tall and proud, the darn traitor that throbbed eagerly for attention, so honest compared to it’s owner.
It took several deep breaths, just to keep his heart from crawling out of his throat as he felt Leilani’s hands caressing his legs, his legs twitching occasionally, fighting back the urge to quickly clap them closed, specially when he felt Leilani coming closer, so close that he could feel the warmth of his body before he even touched him.But when he did, it nearly sent Shi Shu flying through the freaking roof.
A warm hand, bigger and stronger than his own, cradled and engulfed his cock in a way that his own, much thinner hand could never achieve, and that alone was enough to make Shi Shu’s hips cant upwards, seeking more of that touch. “A-Ah—!” Shi Shu threw his head back, hips twitching minusculely when a calloused thumb pressed against the tip, something akin to a pained whine squeezing out of his throat when that same desperately needed pressure vanished, leaving him twitching with dissatisfaction.
Too riled up to care about embarrassment at this point, Shi Shu finally tilted his head down again to see what had made Leilani stop.
His bravery was rewarded with a sight that would haunt his dreams for months, if not years; Leilani braced on his legs, face flustered as he slowly leaned down to take his length into his mouth, full lips pressing like a kiss against the wet crown before spreading open wide, taking him inside, smearing a trail of precum across his tongue—
“L-Leilani! You—!” The alarm in his voice merged into a moan, and suddenly he wasn’t even sure what he was trying to say. In fact, he was pretty sure that anything that resembled or was close to coherent thought had just poured out of his head through his ears; all that was left was Leilani, and the wet, warm and tight slide of his mouth as he swallowed him whole, just pure, raw pleasure dripping down every inch of his body like Shi Shu had never felt it before, making his toes curls against the mattress and his stomach flutter with each shaky breath that he took.
Heavens, the most he’d ever known was the rare encounters with his own hand, and those had been painfully dry, rushed, and mingled heavily with a dosage of self-deprecating guilt. And now, he wasn’t sure if he would ever want the touch of his own hand again, though, after experiencing this.This should just be their new nightly routine from now on, or even their morning routine, he certainly wasn’t picky—Shi Shu thought, somewhere in the scattered mess of his thoughts, too lost and drowning in the sea of sensations that was Leilani’s mouth to care about ‘shame’ or any of the other useless things that usually stood like a filter between his thoughts and his actions.
Shi Shu’s hands moved without even bothering to request any form of consent from his brain, shaky as they reached down to stroke Leilani’s cheek—breath hitching in his throat when he realized that he could literally feel himself through it—before sliding up to bury his fingers in his hair; not pulling, not tugging, just nervously kneading his curls like one might squeeze a stressball.
Shi Shu wasn’t a loud person. His voice was always kept at a nice, pleasant tone, his happiness was quiet and often expressed through the barrier of a decorative fan, and even when he was mad or frustrated, he would never raise his voice.
Therefor, knowing himself as well as he did, Shi Shu was genuinely shocked when a moan blurted out of his mouth just when Leilani teased the tip of his cock with his tongue, a sound that returned over and over again, more and more frequent with each repetition; deep breaths gradually becoming ragged, breathless gasps becoming proper whimpers when he increased his pace, his mouth, for once, refusing to be silenced.
“Nuan nan—nuan nan! I…I can’t—oh god!” Shi Shu whimpered, his grip on his hair tightening and his eyes squeezed shut—which, again, was even worst, because now he could hear every single little sound, every wet, slippery slide of Leilani’s mouth around him, the wet strokes of his tongue when he stopped at the top, his groans and frantic breaths as he….
And then, like an epiphany, it suddenly struck him; there was only one hand on him.
There was only one arm braced on his leg, only one hand wrapped around his length, but he couldn’t feel Leilani’s other hand anywhere else in his body.Forcing his eyes open, Shi Shu hesitantly peered down at Leilani.
….He found his other arm.
Shi Shu had never seen another man pleasuring himself. Not even himself. All of his affairs with his hand had happened through the tissue that he would wrap around himself first, and it was either under the six layers of blankets in his bed, or in the bath, where his hand would be hidden away from view under a layer of bubbles, so that he could almost pretend that he wasn’t doing anything wrong, just innocently washing himself. Thoroughly.
He couldn’t tear his eyes away, though, from the hand moving stiffly between Leilani’s legs, like he was just barely holding himself back from rubbing himself raw, and although the skirts of Pali Kai had a lot of room, Shi Shu could see as clear as day, the bulge pressed against his own hand.
His hand twitched where it gripped Leilani’s shoulder; he wanted to touch it. He wanted to know how it would feel, to weight it in his palm, feel it’s warmth, it’s girth, he wanted to see Leilani’s face twisted with pure pleasure as he wrapped his hand around him—would his hands even be big enough, oh god, what if he had to use two hands, and why was the thought so dangerously trilling—and then, maybe…maybe he’d be able to show him what he’d learned with him, and gods above, he wanted to, he wanted him so badly—Shi Shu’s cock gave a happy little throb inside Leilani’s mouth, the pressure behind his balls suddenly drew taunt, and before Shi Shu could help it, his hips began to twitch, desperately chasing after the heat of his mouth even though he actually meant to do the opposite. “N-Nuan nan, stand back! I can’t—I’m so close, I’m so—!” Shi Shu whimpered, trying desperately to pull his head back, but his hands were too shaky, and he was so close, so close that he could almost taste it, the sensation almost edging towards the wrong side of too much by the time he tipped over the edge.
A ragged moan poured out of his throat as if he was being gutted alive, his back arching off the bed as his whole body convulsed, as years of pent up energy and sexual-repression poured out of him.Shi Shu wasn’t even sure what he was saying; he was vaguely aware of hearing himself saying something making to ‘so good, so good to me’, a scrambled mess in Ban Zi Zhen’s dialect that could be summed up as just a continuous and desperate string of lewd pleas that he would never translate to Leilani, and repetitive warnings trying to tell Leilani to pull away.
He didn’t, though.
And maybe in a few minutes, he would be able to feel thoroughly mortified over the fact that he could literally feel himself pouring his cum inside Leilani’s mouth like a fountain, mostly because he could feel some leaking out of his mouth and running down the sides of his sated erection…but right now, Shi Shu didn’t have the strength to even think, much less gather enough to be anxious about anything.
Finally coming down from it’s high, Shi Shu’s body dropped back against the bed, still shaking and twitching, skin flushed pink and chest heaving like he’d just ran for miles.How was he meant to just…move on with his day after this? No wonder people always did this at night, he could hardly bear the thought of moving, much less walk.
“…Nuan nan.” Shi Shu rasped out, his throat dry and slightly sore, but his tone was dripping like hot melted chocolate, lazy and languid from the afterglow, looking like a pile of just content and thoroughly sated shaky limbs.
It only lasted so long, though; the moment he managed to crack his eyes open again, Shi Shu’s gaze dropped back on Leilani, and the consequences hit him like a slap to the face.“Oh. O-Oh no! We…we need to get you a cup, water, a towel, oh gods, I just—! In your mouth, oh no I didn’t mean to—!” He spluttered, clumsy limbs, still buzzing and everything, already trying to sit up to grab all the necessary items.
Leilani wouldn’t move away. A part of him told him that he should, and another part of him told him that he should experience as much as he could. He would have plenty of time to learn what was right and what was wrong and what things were good and bad. He would learn if he should truly pull away or if he could handle finishing Shi Shu off completely with only his mouth alone.
He thrilled off of this. Shi Shu pressed up into his mouth, thrusting as if this were truly as good as sex was supposed to be. He wanted more, and Leilani wanted to give it to him. He wanted Shi Shu to truly feel what being loved like this was like. So, when he felt his hips tremble and his erection throb in his mouth, Leilani pushed down further, taking him in as he came.
The taste was bitter and the texture strange, but it was worth it. Shi Shu wasn’t even speaking the same language anymore, his moaning absolutely filthy and sending a pleasurable chill down his spine, making him rub his hand harder between his own legs.
He could feel his cum spilling out the corner of his lips as he pulled away, never once taking his eyes off of Shi Shu as he swallowed and wiped his face on the edge of his skirt. Shi Shu’s chest rose and fell, his cheeks were red and his body like a languid pool. His first time in more than five years.
He wanted to touch him more and make up for lost time, but Shi Shu was already fretting, sputtering about getting a towel and getting out of bed.
“Stop,” Leilani said, laughing and putting his hands on Shi Shu’s shoulders so he could push him back against the mattress. “Relax. I’m fine. You’re acting like you just stabbed me in the chest with a knife instead of letting me suck you off.”
He knelt back between Shi Shu’s legs, watching his erection start to wilt, still slick with his own cum and saliva. He teased a finger up and down his sensitive length, then over the insides of his thighs — just experimenting. This whole thing was new to them both.Leilani hadn’t finished, his own erection begging for attention underneath the folds of his skirt, but Leilani ignored it. He didn’t know if Shi Shu would want to keep going — and really, it was his fault for pushing him so far so fast. He wanted to see it, though, and he wanted to try doing what he did. He had no regrets, even if his cock throbbed each time he looked at Shi Shu laying naked on his bed, hair tangled and cheeks splotched with red.
He scooted up a little more, sitting himself on Shi Shu’s lap, straddling his hips. He could probably feel just how turned on he was.
“I want to keep going,” Leilani said, running his fingertip over Shi Shu’s horns the way he’d been doing earlier. “Do you think you can?”If he couldn’t, he wouldn’t have a problem with finishing himself off here. Already his hand was back between his legs, applying pressure where his body desperately craved it, his hips rolling over Shi Shu’s, trying to sate his arousal while he waited for an answer.
“I…want to go all the way,” Leilani said. And maybe that was silly — the two of them had never done anything like this before — but, they were married. He’d been wanting this for a long time.
“If I wait I think I’ll just end up undressing you in my head all afternoon until we get back here, and I really don’t think that’s very chiefly of me,” he said. “As my husband and advisor, I think you’ll agree.”
He swallowed it.
Oh god he swallowed it, and while Shi Shu was pretty sure that there were no unhealthy consequences given how many times that action had been described in the 32 books that he’d been made to read—not to mention how, apparently, in some cultures, swallowing was a show of loyalty and faithfulness, and some even found spitting out straight-up offensive in some cases, as it was seen as a rejection of their lovers’ affections—it was still mortifying in a….weirdly thrilling way, one that made his legs feel weak enough for Leilani to lay him back onto the bed without the slightest struggle, redness seeping into the blue of his horns again when Leilani spoke and he caught a glimpse of white in his mouth.
….Heavens, he was corrupted. There was no way back from now on; he’d been converted into the dark side, and he couldn’t even find it in him to feel guilty about it.
Specially when Leilani proceeded to still torment his poor, limp and drained cock with the gentlest touches, making it twitch and weep a few last tears on his stomach as his touch trailed down to his thighs, while Shi Shu could do nothing but whimper weakly on the bed, twitching with each jab at his overstimulated nerves.
At last, satisfied once he had a thoroughly riled up husband twitching underneath him, Leilani took a seat on top of him, his weight a grounding pressure that Shi Shu’s still-buzzing body welcomed all too happily…
And then, he saw it. No longer obscured in Leilani’s own shadow, or hidden behind his hand, and as far as Shi Shu was concerned, far bigger-looking than it had felt back when he was sitting on it.
With a dry and hard swallow, Shi Shu watched with avid attention as Leilani pressed his own hand down over his boner, his fingers digging into the mattress as he felt the first hints of arousal squeezing through the sweetness of his afterglow as his husband rolled his hips temptingly against him, heat re-gathering in his navel in a heartbeat, when Leilani voiced out loud a thought that Shi Shu hadn’t even realized that was slowly creeping into his head.
“I—ah!” Shi Shi’s response was interrupted by his own heated hiss, head tipping and pressing against Leilani’s touch, his eyes nearly rolling back into his head when the still-new sensation of tingles rushing down his spine merged with the other, warmer and deeper tingles going on between his legs, encouraging his limp cock to twitch and stir awake once again. “I want to…I want to keep going.” Shi Shi finally managed to answer—something between a shaky whimper and a desperate rasp; hot and hungry, like he was the one who had yet to get off—, too drunk on the cocktail of his afterglow mixed in with his renewed arousal, hips already undulating underneath Leilani, seeking more friction.
And if Leilani had any doubts that he meant it, then Shi Shu was quick to show just how damn serious he was about it; emboldened by the heat coiled in his stomach and with his usual inhibitions pushed aside by raw desire, Shi Shu rested his hands on Leilani’s knees and slowly but firmly, slid them up his legs, fingers spread out as if trying to grab as much of him as possible, nails scratching so lightly across his skin as his hands slipped underneath Leilani’s skirt, squeezing and kneading his strong thighs just to feel them twitch under his hands.
Shi Shu wanted to sink his teeth on them.
…..It truly was one way to tell just how gone out of his mind he was.
Gaze hazy and face flushed with want, Shi Shu pushed himself up, one hand holding onto Leilani to help hoist his post-orgasm-lazy body to sit up, only to accidentally end up groping Leilani’s ass while searching for something to grab onto. Embarrassment chalked up another attempt to latch its greedy claws on him, but just like hands trying to find purchase on an oily surface, it just slid off his shoulders with a single twitch of his renewed erection, especially as his attention latched onto Leilani’s skirt, his bulge so temptingly close that Shi Shu could almost swear that he could see the tiny twitches of a pained erection struggling against it’s restraints.
Finally sliding his hands out from underneath Leilani’s skirt, Shi Shu began to shakily undo with sash—even he couldn’t tell whether he was just nervous or just straight up too eager—, carefully unwrapping the skirt from around his waist. Even with the underwear still on, Shi Shu could already tell that he was bigger than him. And somehow, instead of the expected embarrassment or jealously, all that Shi Shu felt was the honey-like drizzling sensation of keen want dripping all over him, mingling with some concerns regarding the notion of ‘going all the way’ being combined with that sort of package.
Licking his lips with anticipation, yet burning with a familiar trickle of nervousness, Shi Shu gently pressed the palm of his hand against the front of Shi Shu’s bulge, slowly stroking up at down. “Does it hurt?” He asked, nearly a whisper, eyes locked on the smear of precum staining the spot where his head must be. After a beat of hesitation, Shi Shu rubbed his thumb against it, not at all surprised when he found it still warm and slick, but definitely caught off guard when the bulge twitched in response. “Does that feel better?”He asked, almost absentmindedly, like he wasn’t expecting an actual answer.
And just like that, horniness surpassed his nerves with an enormous leap, as Shi Shu’s hands finally slipped under Leilani’s underwear, pulling it down as much as he could despite their current position making it impossible to remove them completely.
Leilani’s cock practically sprung out, throbbing and eager, and in a rather detached-out-of-shock manner, Shi Shu couldn’t help but think; given their current angle, and their height difference, had he been leaning down just a bit, he could have risked getting slapped across the face by it.
He was right. It was bigger.
It wasn’t straight up enormous, like some descriptions of his books, but….well, to Shi Shu, who had exactly zero experience in that department, and that had only ever seen two dicks in his whole life (his own, and this one), this was already looking quite overwhelming to him, especially when ‘going all the way’ just kept on ringing and singing hauntingly in the back of his brain.
But, not overwhelming enough to stop himself from sliding his hands up, and taking that girth between them. It was also thicker, Shi Shu realized, watching fascinated as his dainty little fingers failed to circle it completely, only managing it if he squeezed it—which, probably wasn’t advisable.
Keyed up with arousal and loosened up from his recent orgasm, Shi Shu tested the waters a little further; one hand stroking the whole length in slow, tentative motions, while the other focused mostly on exploring, tracing a thumb across the thicker vein on the underside of his cock, curiously stroking his stiff ballsack with the palm of his hand, and then coming back up to trace the ridges of the mushroom-shaped head, prodding the weeping slit with his thumb when more precum poured out to slick the motions of his hand.
Leaning closer, until they were practically pressed together, with Leilani’s erection smearing slick across his stomach, Shi Shu pressed long, heated kisses to his neck, teeth grazing his skin as he fought back the nearly animalistic urge to rut against him, his own erection making a valiant return, twitching against Leilani’s bare thigh.
“You took such good care of me…let me return the favor, nuan nan.” Shi Shu whispered in his ear, pressing tender kisses all across his jaw and earlobe, freeing one hand to grasp Leilani’s waist to keep him still as he increased his pace, each slide wet and loud every time his fist clapped against his ballsack, lewd sounds that had him split between being embarrassed or painfully turned on.
“I…will you last if I…if I, you know; do the thing that you did to me?” Shi Shu murmured, his shyness contrasting heavily with the eager motions of his hand on Leilani’s cock, his own hips twitching underneath him to rub himself against his thigh until it was warm and slick with cum. “What do you need me to do for you, nuan nan? Should I stop? Continue? Go faster, harder? Slower, gentler?” He asked, whispering each question against his jaw and punctuating each one of them with wet kisses and the occasional nibble on his neck, his horns pink and his eyes nearly glazed over with lust. “What do you want the most, A-Leilani?”
Leilani had no idea what shifted inside Shi Shu, but something did and he seemed to be blossoming with a new level of confidence that Leilani hadn’t seen before.
He liked it.
He had spent the last month or so trying to get Shi Shu to build some respect in himself. The first day he had seen it was in their first political meeting. The next time had been when he built the irrigation system. Leilani had been so proud of him. Things like that were easy, though, and they didn’t involve too much emotion other than willpower. Doing this, taking the reins in bed, touching him, removing his skirt and touching him through his underwear. It was startling, absolutely, but not unpleasant. In fact, it was delightful. He had never been touched by anyone else before, and even through his underwear it was absolutely pleasant. Shi Shu asked a question and he could barely manage to hum an answer in response, simply because he was so overwhelmed. All his fantasies were finally coming true, and yet this was so much better than any of those. This was real. This was how Shi Shu wanted to act.
His eyes snapped open the moment he felt his underwear tugged down, and Shi Shu was already moving to touch it, unafraid, confident. Leilani could have watched that all day long.
Shi Shu’s confidence was, somehow, a far greater turn on than anything else. He could’ve worn that lingerie for him, he could’ve put on a show for him, done everything he asked, and yet it was his confidence, his desire to do exactly what he wanted, that made Leilani aroused. He couldn’t get enough of it.
His breaths were ragged as Shi Shu began stroking him, heating things up further by placing delicate kisses across his skin, pressing even closer. Somehow, Shi Shu was already hard again, and Leilani’s greedy hands wanted to slip between their bodies and touch him solely so he could see him whimper and melt. There would be time for that, though.
He tilted his head, rubbing his cheek lightly against Shi Shu’s horns while he whispered dirty things, lewd suggestions. His voice was somehow deeper, needy.
“I’ll last,” Leilani said, not because he was sure that he would, but because he refused to finish until they went all the way. “I want to fuck you, or be fucked by you, or anything — I don’t care,” he said, his hands firmly gripping Shi Shu’s bare hips, keeping him pressed close against him. “Whatever happens before that…doesn’t matter. I’ll like it. I like this,” he said, shifting his hips in an attempt to match Shi Shu’s rhythm, the stickiness between their legs somehow erotic. The air around them felt humid and thick, like before a thunderstorm, and Leilani wanted to feel that first crack of lightning.
“I like being with you,” he said. And maybe it was cheesy, but it was the truth. It didn’t matter what they did as long as they did it. They had finally managed to do something and get somewhere and anything else was a bonus in Leilani’s opinion.
“Which one of us should…you know? I don’t…I mean,” he stumbled over his words, partly because of the embarrassing subject and partly because Shi Shu was doing a very good job of, hm, distracting him. He could feel his teeth on his neck, his hand working hard on his erection, making him twitch and stealing his breath. It was a miracle he was even still able to speak. The love of his life was finally touching him — any thoughts past that were barely coherent.
Suddenly Husbands
Leilani was going to be the death of him. That wasn’t exactly new to him, but Shi Shu had never thought that he would expire in this particular setting; with his husband straddling his lap, with his cock in his hands and his own cum staining his thighs.
His ears burned, eyes casting downwards with shame—not that doing that would do anything to save his dignity, since it only meant that now he had no other choice but watch his own hand stroking Leilani in languid motions—, and he nearly ducked his head to smother an embarrassed whimper on his chest.
He couldn’t really scold him, though, could he? How hypocrite of him would that be, given how there was no way that Leilani missed the way that he twitched against his leg when he said that particular choice of words.
Ah, he was so weak, so damn weak for Leilani—always was, regardless of whether it was a pile of work growing suspiciously small despite Leilani’s slug-like speed, skinned loquats hand-fed to a spoiled but lovely mouth, or the hungry, desperate plea to take or be taken— and there was no shame in that, not when he had him on his lap, more disheveled and desperate than he’d ever seen him, and Shi Shu wanted to give him everything and more, so turned on and smitten with the rosy tint that darkened his cheeks, his desperate gasps, the feeling of his muscles drawing taunt with each roll of his hips…
Leilani could have asked to go for three rounds in a go, and Shi Shu would have found a way, magical or not, to get it up over and over again, just for him.
Muffling his rapid breaths in the crook of Leilani’s neck, Shi Shu muffled a whine when he felt the unmistakable feeling of his cheek brushing across his horn, rolling his hips so hard against him that his own erection stroked across Leilani’s. “Just…just give me a second to think. I need…I need to think.” Shi Shu whispered, mouthing the words against the slick and warm skin of his neck.
In his head, Shi Shu had always imagined himself on the receiving end. Maybe it was because he’d always be a meek and submissive little thing in bed, or more likely even, because the Elders had always reinforced that he had to take a more feminine role in their relationship—the pretty spouse that would play instruments for his husband, always pale and delicate, something meant to sit still and look pretty.
And….well, Shi Shu certainly wouldn’t have minded being the one on the receiving end—especially if it implied Leilani towering above him like before, staring down at him like he wanted to eat him up—but on the other hand…
Shaking himself out of his thoughts for a moment, Shi Shu glanced down at the erection twitching in his grip. He looked pretty much on edge but, he did say that he would last, didn’t he? And not only would it be terribly unfair if they ended this without him reciprocating Leilani’s previous favors, but also, was it not selfish of him, to just leave Leilani hanging while he pondered on the pros and cons of all the options?
So, smoothing his free hand across the arch of his husband’s back before settling it back on his hip, Shi Shu pressed another kiss to his shoulder, and allowed himself just a few moments to stew on his own embarrassment, before he finally leaned back, putting some distance between them again. “I’ll…I’ll keep you distracted while I think!” Shi Shu promised, face red as it could physically be, but eyes determined.
He gave Leilani no time to wonder about which distraction he would provide him with; leaning forwards, Shi Shu placed a kiss on his other shoulder, and then lower, slowly planting shy, fluttery kisses all over his chest, sternum, over the dip of his abs, around his bellybutton, and finally, his navel, where his chin bumped lightly against Leilani’s erection, putting his trail of kisses to a halt.
….It was now or never! If Leilani could do it (and so enthusiastically too), then Shi Shu could provide him with such service as well!
Taking a long, deep breath, Shi Shu quickly went through all of his mental notes regarding this subject—plus some added tips from what he’d felt and saw earlier—, and after a moment of hesitation, stuck his tongue out and slowly swirled it around the tip, tracing the ridges, the thick vein of his underside, getting himself acquainted with this still-new and unfamiliar territory.
…
It didn’t taste very good, quite honestly, Shi Shu felt that most of the books he’d read had exaggerated quite greatly—he still mentally winced thinking about certain choice of words such as ‘love juice’ or ‘honey seed’—but it was tolerable enough, and this wasn’t about him now, was it? Heavens, Leilani had swallowed a mouthful of him; Shi Shu could handle a little taste of salty bitterness!
Gradually growing bolder, Shi Shu attempted to take Leilani into his mouth…and took no longer than 5 seconds to promptly choke on it.
“I’m fine I’m fine! I-I think I went a bit too fast…” Shi Shu mumbled sheepishly, embarrassment crawling up his face as he finished coughing, rubbing two fingers across his throat before dipping his head down one more time, taking him in more gradually this time.
It was an…..awkward descent; mostly because Leilani was far more ‘girthy’ than he was, forcing Shi Shu to be very careful as to not choke a second time.
Determined to not disappoint, though, Shi Shu focused on things that he himself had found quite pleasurable back when it was his turn; he stroked the inches that he couldn’t take into his mouth with his fingers, swirled his tongue around the tip whenever he came up for air, dipping his tongue in the slit despite the saltiness, and when he went down, he tried to push himself a little further, taking him a little deeper, until his eyes teared up from the sheer pressure.
His hair, though, not for the first time, revealed itself to be quite more bothersome than it was truly worth it, constantly sliding off his shoulders, gluing itself to their sticky bodies and, on a few mortifying occasions, nearly getting in his mouth while he went down on Leilani. Frustrated over the constant interruptions, Shi Shu suddenly took one of Leilani’s hands and, quickly gathering most of his hair in a bundled mess, guided that hand to it, curling his fingers firmly around his strands and giving it a meaningful squeeze to keep him from revealing it.
With the hair issue taken care of, and Leilani’s successfully distracted, Shi Shu could finally give the main issue some thought; who would be on the receiving end?
Again, first instinctive answer was, himself. And Shi Shu might have stuck to that answer, if it wasn’t for a teeny tiny little detail…
A ‘teeny tiny detail’ that bumped against the back of his throat, making him grunt and squeeze his eyes shut around another batch of tears. Shi Shu had never done anything with his…backdoor, but as far as he was concerned, his mouth stretched open far more easily than that did, and yet, his jaw already felt sore, his mouth too full, and he was pretty sure that he would still feel the bulge of Leilani’s cock in his throat when he woke up tomorrow. Imagining that sort of pressure down there, did things to Shi Shu’s nerves, and this time not the good type of things.
…But on the other hand—he mentally whimpered, another wave of embarrassment washing over him—would…would he even know what to do, on the giving end?! Lelani seemed genuinely interested in either of the available options, and Shi Shu trusted his word but…oh gods, what if he messed up, what if he hurt Leilani, what if—
No more what ifs!—Scolded the frustrated and fed-up part of his brain that rapped it’s metaphorical fan across his head multiple times. He’d promised himself that he would do this again, that he wouldn’t hesitate over simple questions because of his imaginary ‘what ifs’.
He had a cock nearly shoved down his throat, he could damn well ask his husband if he would be willing to take one up his bottom!
Pulling out with a strangled gasp, Shi Shu finally straightened his back, popping it back into place as he lifted his head to look up at Leilani. His face was blotched red, tears ran down his face from exertion, and he sounded as if he’d been holding his breath underwater all this time, but his gaze was bright and determined.
“Nuan nan, I….don’t think I’m quite ready to take your….your masculinity, it’s uh…a bit intimidating for a specific part of my body right now.” He admitted, sheepishness bleeding into his confidence in a matter of seconds, only to be promptly shoved back as another glimmer of determination flashed through his eyes.
“But! It’s okay! See, I read about this too; tomorrow, I can take a long, warm bath; I read that it makes the body loose and much more flexible! In fact, did you know that in some countries, couples have their first time in a bathtub, exactly to ease the intrusion? Oh we could try that too…it certainly would help with the clean up, wouldn’t it?” Shi Shu pointed out, split between being thoroughly embarrassed over the subject, while over-enthusiastic in the familiar way that he always was over anything that he read and that he wanted to try out.
Shameless? Was Shi Shu really going to say that wanting to admire his body was shameless when they were doing, well, this? He didn’t know how far they would go — if they would go all the way — but, for someone who wouldn’t even look at his bare chest a month or so ago, this was far more shameless than anything else.
Shi Shu pulled his hands free of his sleeves, giving Leilani a perfect glimpse of his long arms, the elegant bend of his elbow and curve of his shoulder. Being in Pali Kai had been good for Shi Shu. He could see a bit of a tan line around his collarbone, and he’d gained weight back from his time imprisoned, finally looking less skeletal. Shi Shu always looked elegant and beautiful, though when he first arrived, Leilani had been filled with worry for his health. Now, though, there were no concerns at all. Shi Shu was probably healthier now than he’d ever been in Ban Zi Zhen.He laid still, hands resting casually on Shi Shu’s hips as his hands wandered over his body, touching every inch of exposed skin that he could. He would lay here for as long as Shi Shu needed to explore, inhaling long and deep while his hands traced lower, his knee pushing against his groin.
And then it was over, Shi Shu sitting up and looking like he had just made a grand discovery — because he had. He, apparently, remembered how sex was supposed to work. He laughed, but the laugh quickly gave way to a breathy moan as Shi Shu rode on top of him, grinding their hips together in a way that was absolutely delightful and also painfully slow. He had been craving this for so long, and now Shi Shu was walking through it like he needed to be taught what to do with the thing dangling between his legs.
“A-Shu,” Leilani said, barely managing to get his words out between the little gasps and giggles that threatened to jump out of his throat. He really didn’t want to laugh at Shi Shu’s attempt at sex coupled with a historical lesson on how most virgins apparently got off with their partners. It was incredible that they had even reached this point. Leilani loved that he got to be here, holding Shi Shu’s hips and leaning up into each slow grind against his lap. He was sure that, with enough time, he could have gotten off with just that alone.His husband, the man he loved for so long, the man he’d been attracted to for so long, was finally responding in kind. He wanted to do this.
“You’re a very smart man, and I love you…very much,” Leilani said, teasing his fingers a bit lower, pushing them under the folds of the fabric still bunched around Shi Shu’s hips, barely clinging on without the sash to hold it. He could see the soft curve of his thighs, and beneath the fabric he knew there was pale skin, soft, and perfectly touchable. He wondered what his skin would look like beneath his hand, grabbed tight while he rocked into him, or sucked him off, or any number of any lewd things.
“But…maybe we can save the sex education lecture…for afterwards?” Leilani asked, sliding one of his hands over Shi Shu’s thigh and just gently grazing his fingers over his crotch, where he could feel a small bulge forming, thanks to Shi Shu’s very important foreplay.
Leilani was already very turned on, heart pounding and body aching for more, swelling underneath the light fabric of his skirt and undergarments. The friction of their clothes and Shi Shu’s hips would get him where he wanted, but there was so much more they could do — so much more that he’d imagined each time he dreamed, or when he snuck out of bed early in the morning to work through a few issues before Shi Shu noticed. Leilani had been very careful about revealing his arousal around Shi Shu, staying in bed longer, heading to the bathroom when he thought Shi Shu wasn’t looking. His main goal this whole time had been to not make Shi Shu feel uncomfortable.“You said…you couldn’t really talk or…or listen when I was touching your horn,” Leilani said. “This is, mm…basically the same.”
He, after some debate, pushed a bit on Shi Shu’s hips and flipped their positions, now straddling him on the bed and taking control of the scenario. He took a moment to breathe and steady himself, though he felt he could have cum just from the sight of Shi Shu laying beneath him. His hair was splayed around him with no rhyme or reason, laying like silk over their sheets. His face was flushed, his body just the slightest bit pink, and his lips swollen from kissing.Sex looked good on him.
“I want to do something,” Leilani said, briefly treating Shi Shu to what he had been giving to him. He rubbed their hips together, slow and firm — deliberate. “If you don’t like it, or if I’m bad at it, you can tell me to stop and I will.”Though, he had a feeling that once he got started, Shi Shu wouldn’t want him to stop. Such was the nature of such things — once things were underway it was hard to stop them. He knew that from experience. But he had a feeling that Shi Shu might not. He’d been here for so long, but he never once saw him sneak away to the bathroom, or ask for a moment alone.
This was a lot of firsts for them both, and he hoped that they were good ones.
Months ago, Shi Shu could have stated, and quite genuinely too, that he didn’t quite understand the appeal of sex. He could…maybe understand that the objective was quite tempting, but the process hadn’t sounded all too appealing to him. The idea of sweaty bodies moving together, smearing body fluids all over each other, hadn’t been exactly alluring to him.
That Shi Shu, though, was a fool.
A poor, ignorant fool that had no idea that Leilani would look so delectable laying underneath him, waves and curls spread like a halo around his head, his smile pleased and eyes dark with lust as his strong, warm hands gripped his hips, fingers digging into his skin through the fabric…
O-Oh—Shi Shu’s heart stuttered in his chest, and the tiny little sounds that dragged out of Leilani’s wonderful mouth, with each motion of his hips, resonated deep in the pits of his stomach, making him feel warm and tingly in ways that he hadn’t felt….ever, actually.
Now that he thought about it, Shi Shu couldn’t recall arousal ever feeling this strong; sharp and deep, like a knife made out of sheer pleasure digging straight into his guts. And it only got better when Leilani returned the favor, hips twitching upwards to meet his, and with each motion, Shi Shu’s breath caught in his throat, little gasps that threatened to become embarrassing and desperate whimpers as the pleasure poured into him, like an unending fountain of wonderful sensations.And yet. It wasn’t enough, somehow.
It was like an itch, the type that constantly shifted around, never satisfied no matter what and it was, unfortunately, a sensation that Shi Shu was painfully familiar with.
After all, Ban Zi Zhen prided itself on their pristine principles, with a possibly unhealthy obsession with the concept of ‘purity’…and what a better way to put those principles to use, than to apply them to their own princes and princesses, and make a shining bright example out of them?As soon as he’d hit puberty, Shi Shu had earned the right to wear his hair up like an adult, his robes were replaced with bigger robed, with double the layers and with sleeves that dragged across the ground, and more importantly; he was made to sit down in front of an Elder, and spent a whole morning learning a lesson that would torture him for years to come.
Giving himself pleasure was not only a sin, but also strictly forbidden—they’d told him, forcing him to write that down 100 times, until he could nearly visualize it in the back of his eyelids— he had to save himself for his future spouse after all, and to grant himself such relief before the time came, wouldn’t just be terribly selfish but also thoroughly disrespectful. Without even getting started on how it showed his lack of patience and self-control, which would have been highly frown upon.But even Shi Shu, was only human. And his budding hormones hadn’t particularly cared about his self-imposed morals.
And yet still, every year, Shi Shu could have counted on one single hand, how many times he’d touched himself. Even that, though, was a long time ago.After all, war hardly provided the privacy and peace of mind necessary to accomplish the necessary…requirements to engage in such activities.
So, all things considered—Shi Shu reasoned, fighting back a whole-body shudder when Leilani’s hands found his bare legs, heart hammering away in his chest when they slid upwards, dangerously close to where his robes were bundled up around his hips, concealing the proof of how own perked up interest—it certainly made sense that he’d be extra responsive and, quite honestly, he felt that he deserved a pat in the back for handling this as well as he did! How many people out there could handle nearly three decades of celibacy?! Especially when his husband was—
Hard—the new train of thought slammed straight into the previous one, forcing it off it’s tracks as it completely consumed every space available of his entire brain, sparing nothing for the remains of his previous lingering thoughts. How had he missed it, heavens, he’d been so focused flipping through the mental pages of his mental encyclopedia that he’d failed to notice the obvious pressure jabbing at him.
But now that he did, Shi Shu couldn’t help but be hyperaware of it’s existence; every thrust and grind was now aimed with the single objective of testing the newly added element, his own arousal twitching underneath the bundled up layers hiding it with each tentative drag across it—And then a gasp startled out of him, startling him out of his thoughts again, as a hand grazed his crotch but didn’t linger there, offering absolutely no relief. Shi Shu’s cheeks burned so hard that they nearly stung, but unfortunately, shame did nothing to tame the fire in the pits of his stomach; if anything, he felt himself get even harder, seeking that pressure again but to no vain.
“I-I..I’m…” He what?! Even Shi Shu didn’t know, his brain too muddled with arousal to form a string of coherent thought, his thighs twitching slightly when Leilani slipped his hand underneath the pile of robes to stroke skin that had never seen the daylight.
Thankfully, Leilani didn’t give him too much time to stress over what he wanted to say, because the very next moment, the world around him spun around and Shi Shu found himself laying back against the bed, legs still on each side of Leilani’s hips, hair and robes disheveled around him, while Leilani hovered above him—
Shi Shu’s throat bobbed into a hard swallow before he could even help himself. This wasn’t fair, not the slightest bit; he’d thought that he liked having Leilani laying underneath him, but this was…well, it did things to Shi Shu. Things that made his concealed boner twitch and leak underneath his robes, his heartbeat strumming a frantic song across his veins as he stared up at Leilani through half-lidded eyes, watching his hair dangle in messy waves around him, taking in the smaller details like, the flushed bottom lip that he’d just sucked between his teeth moments before, the rare warm hue that colored his cheeks, the pure, raw hunger that dilated his eyes…The pressure of their hips connecting once again was completely unnecessary; Shi Shu was pretty sure that he was already leaning towards the edge just from laying underneath his husband like this, and maybe he was too pent up already, but he couldn’t help the way his back arched away from the bed with a gasp, when Leilani bucks harder, much firmer than his own previous tentative little back-and-forth motions.
He wasn’t going to last—Shi Shu suddenly realized, with amounting mortification, anther sharp gasp pushing out of his lungs with the next thrust.
“Y-Yes,” Shi Shu breathed out, struggling for a moment to gather enough saliva and sense into his mouth before he could upgrade to longer sentences. “I…you can do as you wish, but uh, fair warning?” He mumbled, nervously shifting his gaze away. “I…hm…haven’t done…anything in a…more or less, lets say, in the last 5 or so years…?” Shi Shu confessed, sheepishly, squeezing his eyes shut as if that would somehow save him some dignity. “I-I honestly don’t know how uh…how much I’m going to last, nuan nan…”
Leilani was given permission to do whatever he wanted, and that was almost scary. Shi Shu was like the entire ocean when Leilani was used to playing only in a puddle.
“That’s okay,” Leilani said, leaning down to press a kiss to Shi Shu’s cheek and then his lips. He didn’t care how long Shi Shu lasted, or if he didn’t even last a minute at all. The fact that he would be able to get him off was enough, and Leilani was reveling in that fact. He was being allowed to touch Shi Shu however he wanted.
To give Shi Shu that kind of untethered pleasure was, as far as he was concerned, the best belated birthday gift he could give him.
He slid backwards, positioning himself between Shi Shu’s legs and, cautiously, as if trying not to spook a baby deer in the woods, pushed the fabric of Shi Shu’s robes aside. As he’d suspected, Shi Shu was quite aroused, bulging against his underwear and even leaking through it. It was Leilani’s first time seeing such a thing. Sure, he had looked down at his own erection before, but this was someone else’s. How different could it be, though?
Somehow, even if it was exactly the same, it felt much more thrilling. This…was because of him. Shi Shu was hard because of him. He was turned on because of him.
He reached his hand out and rubbed his palm against the bulge, through the fabric, testing the waters. He avoided Shi Shu’s gaze at first — not sure if he could bring himself to look at someone while he was doing this. But then, he wanted to see how he looked. He wanted to see if he was reacting the right ways — if he was doing a good job.
So, with red cheeks, he chanced a glance up at Shi Shu.
He imagined they both looked about the same — breathless and twitching, faces red with lust and embarrassment. It was beautiful.
Carefully, slowly, he slid his fingertips beneath the waist of Shi Shu’s underwear and began pulling it downward, careful not to drag it over his erection too hard. When his arousal sprung free, naked and dripping, Leilani felt butterflies tickling his stomach. They were really doing this. This was really happening.He helped Shi Shu’s ankles out from the holes of his undergarments, then kissed his way back up his legs, hands running over the soft, pale skin. His fingers trembled just slightly with nerves as he approached the object of his intent. He had touched himself plenty of times, sure, but sucked himself off? Never. That was impossible. He had no idea if he would be good at it or if it even mattered. Anything would probably feel good as long as he didn’t bite Shi Shu’s dick off…
He knelt between Shi Shu, his own erection neglected and pressed firmly against his underwear, begging for attention. He was thankful for his skirt to hide it from Shi Shu’s eyes — for now, anyway.
He took a short breath and reached one of his hands out, wrapping it carefully around Shi Shu’s length, running his thumb over the sensitive tip and smearing precum downwards, over the shaft. The simple action had himself throbbing, turned on by such a lewd sight. Gods, how he had craved this. How many nights had he laid awake praying that one day Shi Shu would want to lay with him? How many nights had he snuck away to touch himself and pretend it was Shi Shu’s hand. How many dreams had he had that involved this exact scenario — him leaning down between Shi Shu’s legs and sliding his mouth over his erection, all while keeping his eyes locked onto his face. He wanted to see every emotion, every ounce of embarrassment, nerves and pleasure. He wanted to witness it all. Maybe that made him a pervert, or maybe that made him a man who was sexually starved. He didn’t care. Every little gesture Shi Shu made sent thrills through his body.
Leilani balanced his weight on his knees and his forearm, which rested on Shi Shu’s upper thigh while he pushed his lips down over the shaft. He opened his mouth a little further and laid his tongue flat against the underside, taking in the taste of bitter and salt. His free hand, mean while, slipped between his own legs, applying consistent pressure to his erection, trying to sate it without pushing himself too far. His body begged for more and he refused to give it. Maybe he really was a pervert.
Still, he leaned down and pushed further, having to shut his eyes as he swallowed Shi Shu’s length as far as he could, leaving just enough room at the base for his hand to steady his hips and his erection. He pulled back and pushed in again, teasing his tongue around the tip each time he did. He wanted to hear Shi Shu moan. He wanted to feel him finish. He wanted to know what his trembling hips would feel like, what he would taste like, if he could cum just from this. Five years without doing anything — surely he wouldn’t last long.He picked up his ministrations, his mouth making lewd sounds against Shi Shu’s skin, his body pushing out little moans of its own as a new feeling or sight made him throb. He rubbed his other hand firmly between his legs, resisting the urge to buck against his palm and speed things up. Leilani would have his turn. He would have his moment. Shi Shu had spent the last three days without his husband. He’d feared he would never see him again.. He needed this. He deserved it. And Leilani would give it to him.
To say Shi Shu was nervous would be an understatement; his nerves were so on edge that he feared that he might still be shaking for days after this.
From a rational level, Shi Shu was well aware of the list of possibilities of what could possibly happen now, but it was one thing to know, and a whole different beast to experience it.He could have listen out loud 69 different positions and their benefits according to the gender of the participants, but in terms of experience, he was still sitting on stage zero!
And at this point, he knew damn well that he couldn’t fully trust his books to tell him the full truth; he’d read so many romances, read all sorts of lewd descriptions, but not a single one of of those stories could have possibly braced him for the sensation of another person’s breath and warmth in his mouth, the slippery feeling of a tongue that didn’t belong in his mouth, the way Leilani’s bottom lip always looked so flushed and swollen after he sucked on it and traced his tongue across it…If a kiss had felt so different from what he’d imagined, then Shi Shu could only wait in a mix of excitement and barely concealed nervousness, as his husband began his descent.
Staring pointedly at the ceiling, Shi Shu took a long deep breath—which then practically stuttered out of his chest when Leilani pushed the rest of his robes aside, baring him completely except for his underwear….which was doing a terrible job at concealing anything at this point, Shi Shu could tell that much without having to even look down—he could feel the strain of his cock trying to stretch the fabric, specially now that the weight of his robes was gone, leaving him pointedly aware of the wetness that he could feel gathering inside his underwear and oh god, it was probably seeping through the fabric, and Leilani was staring and there was no way that there wasn’t a massive stain on the front and Leilani was—
“M-hm!” Shi Shu whimpered, startling at the sudden contact, instinctively looking down and…and heavens, that was a terrible decision, because Leilani was already looking up at him, watching him with an intensity that should be straight up illegal, and his cheeks were so red, redder than Shi Shu had ever seen, and under any other circumstances, he might have reached down to cup that warm cheek in his hand, maybe pull him up to watch it more closely…
But! Maybe not when he had his hand pressed right against his boner!
Fingers hooked around his underwear just as his head snapped back to stare intensely at the ceiling, and if Shi Shu had felt bared before, then he wasn’t even sure how to process his own nakedness the moment his underwear slipped down his legs, leaving every single inch of his skin naked and exposed to Leilani’s eager gaze. And right there, standing tall and proud, the darn traitor that throbbed eagerly for attention, so honest compared to it’s owner.
It took several deep breaths, just to keep his heart from crawling out of his throat as he felt Leilani’s hands caressing his legs, his legs twitching occasionally, fighting back the urge to quickly clap them closed, specially when he felt Leilani coming closer, so close that he could feel the warmth of his body before he even touched him.But when he did, it nearly sent Shi Shu flying through the freaking roof.
A warm hand, bigger and stronger than his own, cradled and engulfed his cock in a way that his own, much thinner hand could never achieve, and that alone was enough to make Shi Shu’s hips cant upwards, seeking more of that touch. “A-Ah—!” Shi Shu threw his head back, hips twitching minusculely when a calloused thumb pressed against the tip, something akin to a pained whine squeezing out of his throat when that same desperately needed pressure vanished, leaving him twitching with dissatisfaction.
Too riled up to care about embarrassment at this point, Shi Shu finally tilted his head down again to see what had made Leilani stop.
His bravery was rewarded with a sight that would haunt his dreams for months, if not years; Leilani braced on his legs, face flustered as he slowly leaned down to take his length into his mouth, full lips pressing like a kiss against the wet crown before spreading open wide, taking him inside, smearing a trail of precum across his tongue—
“L-Leilani! You—!” The alarm in his voice merged into a moan, and suddenly he wasn’t even sure what he was trying to say. In fact, he was pretty sure that anything that resembled or was close to coherent thought had just poured out of his head through his ears; all that was left was Leilani, and the wet, warm and tight slide of his mouth as he swallowed him whole, just pure, raw pleasure dripping down every inch of his body like Shi Shu had never felt it before, making his toes curls against the mattress and his stomach flutter with each shaky breath that he took.
Heavens, the most he’d ever known was the rare encounters with his own hand, and those had been painfully dry, rushed, and mingled heavily with a dosage of self-deprecating guilt. And now, he wasn’t sure if he would ever want the touch of his own hand again, though, after experiencing this.This should just be their new nightly routine from now on, or even their morning routine, he certainly wasn’t picky—Shi Shu thought, somewhere in the scattered mess of his thoughts, too lost and drowning in the sea of sensations that was Leilani’s mouth to care about ‘shame’ or any of the other useless things that usually stood like a filter between his thoughts and his actions.
Shi Shu’s hands moved without even bothering to request any form of consent from his brain, shaky as they reached down to stroke Leilani’s cheek—breath hitching in his throat when he realized that he could literally feel himself through it—before sliding up to bury his fingers in his hair; not pulling, not tugging, just nervously kneading his curls like one might squeeze a stressball.
Shi Shu wasn’t a loud person. His voice was always kept at a nice, pleasant tone, his happiness was quiet and often expressed through the barrier of a decorative fan, and even when he was mad or frustrated, he would never raise his voice.
Therefor, knowing himself as well as he did, Shi Shu was genuinely shocked when a moan blurted out of his mouth just when Leilani teased the tip of his cock with his tongue, a sound that returned over and over again, more and more frequent with each repetition; deep breaths gradually becoming ragged, breathless gasps becoming proper whimpers when he increased his pace, his mouth, for once, refusing to be silenced.
“Nuan nan—nuan nan! I…I can’t—oh god!” Shi Shu whimpered, his grip on his hair tightening and his eyes squeezed shut—which, again, was even worst, because now he could hear every single little sound, every wet, slippery slide of Leilani’s mouth around him, the wet strokes of his tongue when he stopped at the top, his groans and frantic breaths as he….
And then, like an epiphany, it suddenly struck him; there was only one hand on him.
There was only one arm braced on his leg, only one hand wrapped around his length, but he couldn’t feel Leilani’s other hand anywhere else in his body.Forcing his eyes open, Shi Shu hesitantly peered down at Leilani.
….He found his other arm.
Shi Shu had never seen another man pleasuring himself. Not even himself. All of his affairs with his hand had happened through the tissue that he would wrap around himself first, and it was either under the six layers of blankets in his bed, or in the bath, where his hand would be hidden away from view under a layer of bubbles, so that he could almost pretend that he wasn’t doing anything wrong, just innocently washing himself. Thoroughly.
He couldn’t tear his eyes away, though, from the hand moving stiffly between Leilani’s legs, like he was just barely holding himself back from rubbing himself raw, and although the skirts of Pali Kai had a lot of room, Shi Shu could see as clear as day, the bulge pressed against his own hand.
His hand twitched where it gripped Leilani’s shoulder; he wanted to touch it. He wanted to know how it would feel, to weight it in his palm, feel it’s warmth, it’s girth, he wanted to see Leilani’s face twisted with pure pleasure as he wrapped his hand around him—would his hands even be big enough, oh god, what if he had to use two hands, and why was the thought so dangerously trilling—and then, maybe…maybe he’d be able to show him what he’d learned with him, and gods above, he wanted to, he wanted him so badly—Shi Shu’s cock gave a happy little throb inside Leilani’s mouth, the pressure behind his balls suddenly drew taunt, and before Shi Shu could help it, his hips began to twitch, desperately chasing after the heat of his mouth even though he actually meant to do the opposite. “N-Nuan nan, stand back! I can’t—I’m so close, I’m so—!” Shi Shu whimpered, trying desperately to pull his head back, but his hands were too shaky, and he was so close, so close that he could almost taste it, the sensation almost edging towards the wrong side of too much by the time he tipped over the edge.
A ragged moan poured out of his throat as if he was being gutted alive, his back arching off the bed as his whole body convulsed, as years of pent up energy and sexual-repression poured out of him.Shi Shu wasn’t even sure what he was saying; he was vaguely aware of hearing himself saying something making to ‘so good, so good to me’, a scrambled mess in Ban Zi Zhen’s dialect that could be summed up as just a continuous and desperate string of lewd pleas that he would never translate to Leilani, and repetitive warnings trying to tell Leilani to pull away.
He didn’t, though.
And maybe in a few minutes, he would be able to feel thoroughly mortified over the fact that he could literally feel himself pouring his cum inside Leilani’s mouth like a fountain, mostly because he could feel some leaking out of his mouth and running down the sides of his sated erection…but right now, Shi Shu didn’t have the strength to even think, much less gather enough to be anxious about anything.
Finally coming down from it’s high, Shi Shu’s body dropped back against the bed, still shaking and twitching, skin flushed pink and chest heaving like he’d just ran for miles.How was he meant to just…move on with his day after this? No wonder people always did this at night, he could hardly bear the thought of moving, much less walk.
“…Nuan nan.” Shi Shu rasped out, his throat dry and slightly sore, but his tone was dripping like hot melted chocolate, lazy and languid from the afterglow, looking like a pile of just content and thoroughly sated shaky limbs.
It only lasted so long, though; the moment he managed to crack his eyes open again, Shi Shu’s gaze dropped back on Leilani, and the consequences hit him like a slap to the face.“Oh. O-Oh no! We…we need to get you a cup, water, a towel, oh gods, I just—! In your mouth, oh no I didn’t mean to—!” He spluttered, clumsy limbs, still buzzing and everything, already trying to sit up to grab all the necessary items.
Leilani wouldn’t move away. A part of him told him that he should, and another part of him told him that he should experience as much as he could. He would have plenty of time to learn what was right and what was wrong and what things were good and bad. He would learn if he should truly pull away or if he could handle finishing Shi Shu off completely with only his mouth alone.
He thrilled off of this. Shi Shu pressed up into his mouth, thrusting as if this were truly as good as sex was supposed to be. He wanted more, and Leilani wanted to give it to him. He wanted Shi Shu to truly feel what being loved like this was like. So, when he felt his hips tremble and his erection throb in his mouth, Leilani pushed down further, taking him in as he came.
The taste was bitter and the texture strange, but it was worth it. Shi Shu wasn’t even speaking the same language anymore, his moaning absolutely filthy and sending a pleasurable chill down his spine, making him rub his hand harder between his own legs.
He could feel his cum spilling out the corner of his lips as he pulled away, never once taking his eyes off of Shi Shu as he swallowed and wiped his face on the edge of his skirt. Shi Shu’s chest rose and fell, his cheeks were red and his body like a languid pool. His first time in more than five years.
He wanted to touch him more and make up for lost time, but Shi Shu was already fretting, sputtering about getting a towel and getting out of bed.
“Stop,” Leilani said, laughing and putting his hands on Shi Shu’s shoulders so he could push him back against the mattress. “Relax. I’m fine. You’re acting like you just stabbed me in the chest with a knife instead of letting me suck you off.”
He knelt back between Shi Shu’s legs, watching his erection start to wilt, still slick with his own cum and saliva. He teased a finger up and down his sensitive length, then over the insides of his thighs — just experimenting. This whole thing was new to them both.Leilani hadn’t finished, his own erection begging for attention underneath the folds of his skirt, but Leilani ignored it. He didn’t know if Shi Shu would want to keep going — and really, it was his fault for pushing him so far so fast. He wanted to see it, though, and he wanted to try doing what he did. He had no regrets, even if his cock throbbed each time he looked at Shi Shu laying naked on his bed, hair tangled and cheeks splotched with red.
He scooted up a little more, sitting himself on Shi Shu’s lap, straddling his hips. He could probably feel just how turned on he was.
“I want to keep going,” Leilani said, running his fingertip over Shi Shu’s horns the way he’d been doing earlier. “Do you think you can?”If he couldn’t, he wouldn’t have a problem with finishing himself off here. Already his hand was back between his legs, applying pressure where his body desperately craved it, his hips rolling over Shi Shu’s, trying to sate his arousal while he waited for an answer.
“I…want to go all the way,” Leilani said. And maybe that was silly — the two of them had never done anything like this before — but, they were married. He’d been wanting this for a long time.
“If I wait I think I’ll just end up undressing you in my head all afternoon until we get back here, and I really don’t think that’s very chiefly of me,” he said. “As my husband and advisor, I think you’ll agree.”
He swallowed it.
Oh god he swallowed it, and while Shi Shu was pretty sure that there were no unhealthy consequences given how many times that action had been described in the 32 books that he’d been made to read—not to mention how, apparently, in some cultures, swallowing was a show of loyalty and faithfulness, and some even found spitting out straight-up offensive in some cases, as it was seen as a rejection of their lovers’ affections—it was still mortifying in a….weirdly thrilling way, one that made his legs feel weak enough for Leilani to lay him back onto the bed without the slightest struggle, redness seeping into the blue of his horns again when Leilani spoke and he caught a glimpse of white in his mouth.
….Heavens, he was corrupted. There was no way back from now on; he’d been converted into the dark side, and he couldn’t even find it in him to feel guilty about it.
Specially when Leilani proceeded to still torment his poor, limp and drained cock with the gentlest touches, making it twitch and weep a few last tears on his stomach as his touch trailed down to his thighs, while Shi Shu could do nothing but whimper weakly on the bed, twitching with each jab at his overstimulated nerves.
At last, satisfied once he had a thoroughly riled up husband twitching underneath him, Leilani took a seat on top of him, his weight a grounding pressure that Shi Shu’s still-buzzing body welcomed all too happily…
And then, he saw it. No longer obscured in Leilani’s own shadow, or hidden behind his hand, and as far as Shi Shu was concerned, far bigger-looking than it had felt back when he was sitting on it.
With a dry and hard swallow, Shi Shu watched with avid attention as Leilani pressed his own hand down over his boner, his fingers digging into the mattress as he felt the first hints of arousal squeezing through the sweetness of his afterglow as his husband rolled his hips temptingly against him, heat re-gathering in his navel in a heartbeat, when Leilani voiced out loud a thought that Shi Shu hadn’t even realized that was slowly creeping into his head.
“I—ah!” Shi Shi’s response was interrupted by his own heated hiss, head tipping and pressing against Leilani’s touch, his eyes nearly rolling back into his head when the still-new sensation of tingles rushing down his spine merged with the other, warmer and deeper tingles going on between his legs, encouraging his limp cock to twitch and stir awake once again. “I want to…I want to keep going.” Shi Shi finally managed to answer—something between a shaky whimper and a desperate rasp; hot and hungry, like he was the one who had yet to get off—, too drunk on the cocktail of his afterglow mixed in with his renewed arousal, hips already undulating underneath Leilani, seeking more friction.
And if Leilani had any doubts that he meant it, then Shi Shu was quick to show just how damn serious he was about it; emboldened by the heat coiled in his stomach and with his usual inhibitions pushed aside by raw desire, Shi Shu rested his hands on Leilani’s knees and slowly but firmly, slid them up his legs, fingers spread out as if trying to grab as much of him as possible, nails scratching so lightly across his skin as his hands slipped underneath Leilani’s skirt, squeezing and kneading his strong thighs just to feel them twitch under his hands.
Shi Shu wanted to sink his teeth on them.
…..It truly was one way to tell just how gone out of his mind he was.
Gaze hazy and face flushed with want, Shi Shu pushed himself up, one hand holding onto Leilani to help hoist his post-orgasm-lazy body to sit up, only to accidentally end up groping Leilani’s ass while searching for something to grab onto. Embarrassment chalked up another attempt to latch its greedy claws on him, but just like hands trying to find purchase on an oily surface, it just slid off his shoulders with a single twitch of his renewed erection, especially as his attention latched onto Leilani’s skirt, his bulge so temptingly close that Shi Shu could almost swear that he could see the tiny twitches of a pained erection struggling against it’s restraints.
Finally sliding his hands out from underneath Leilani’s skirt, Shi Shu began to shakily undo with sash—even he couldn’t tell whether he was just nervous or just straight up too eager—, carefully unwrapping the skirt from around his waist. Even with the underwear still on, Shi Shu could already tell that he was bigger than him. And somehow, instead of the expected embarrassment or jealously, all that Shi Shu felt was the honey-like drizzling sensation of keen want dripping all over him, mingling with some concerns regarding the notion of ‘going all the way’ being combined with that sort of package.
Licking his lips with anticipation, yet burning with a familiar trickle of nervousness, Shi Shu gently pressed the palm of his hand against the front of Shi Shu’s bulge, slowly stroking up at down. “Does it hurt?” He asked, nearly a whisper, eyes locked on the smear of precum staining the spot where his head must be. After a beat of hesitation, Shi Shu rubbed his thumb against it, not at all surprised when he found it still warm and slick, but definitely caught off guard when the bulge twitched in response. “Does that feel better?”He asked, almost absentmindedly, like he wasn’t expecting an actual answer.
And just like that, horniness surpassed his nerves with an enormous leap, as Shi Shu’s hands finally slipped under Leilani’s underwear, pulling it down as much as he could despite their current position making it impossible to remove them completely.
Leilani’s cock practically sprung out, throbbing and eager, and in a rather detached-out-of-shock manner, Shi Shu couldn’t help but think; given their current angle, and their height difference, had he been leaning down just a bit, he could have risked getting slapped across the face by it.
He was right. It was bigger.
It wasn’t straight up enormous, like some descriptions of his books, but….well, to Shi Shu, who had exactly zero experience in that department, and that had only ever seen two dicks in his whole life (his own, and this one), this was already looking quite overwhelming to him, especially when ‘going all the way’ just kept on ringing and singing hauntingly in the back of his brain.
But, not overwhelming enough to stop himself from sliding his hands up, and taking that girth between them. It was also thicker, Shi Shu realized, watching fascinated as his dainty little fingers failed to circle it completely, only managing it if he squeezed it—which, probably wasn’t advisable.
Keyed up with arousal and loosened up from his recent orgasm, Shi Shu tested the waters a little further; one hand stroking the whole length in slow, tentative motions, while the other focused mostly on exploring, tracing a thumb across the thicker vein on the underside of his cock, curiously stroking his stiff ballsack with the palm of his hand, and then coming back up to trace the ridges of the mushroom-shaped head, prodding the weeping slit with his thumb when more precum poured out to slick the motions of his hand.
Leaning closer, until they were practically pressed together, with Leilani’s erection smearing slick across his stomach, Shi Shu pressed long, heated kisses to his neck, teeth grazing his skin as he fought back the nearly animalistic urge to rut against him, his own erection making a valiant return, twitching against Leilani’s bare thigh.
“You took such good care of me…let me return the favor, nuan nan.” Shi Shu whispered in his ear, pressing tender kisses all across his jaw and earlobe, freeing one hand to grasp Leilani’s waist to keep him still as he increased his pace, each slide wet and loud every time his fist clapped against his ballsack, lewd sounds that had him split between being embarrassed or painfully turned on.
“I…will you last if I…if I, you know; do the thing that you did to me?” Shi Shu murmured, his shyness contrasting heavily with the eager motions of his hand on Leilani’s cock, his own hips twitching underneath him to rub himself against his thigh until it was warm and slick with cum. “What do you need me to do for you, nuan nan? Should I stop? Continue? Go faster, harder? Slower, gentler?” He asked, whispering each question against his jaw and punctuating each one of them with wet kisses and the occasional nibble on his neck, his horns pink and his eyes nearly glazed over with lust. “What do you want the most, A-Leilani?”
Shameless? Was Shi Shu really going to say that wanting to admire his body was shameless when they were doing, well, this? He didn’t know how far they would go — if they would go all the way — but, for someone who wouldn’t even look at his bare chest a month or so ago, this was far more shameless than anything else.
Shi Shu pulled his hands free of his sleeves, giving Leilani a perfect glimpse of his long arms, the elegant bend of his elbow and curve of his shoulder. Being in Pali Kai had been good for Shi Shu. He could see a bit of a tan line around his collarbone, and he’d gained weight back from his time imprisoned, finally looking less skeletal. Shi Shu always looked elegant and beautiful, though when he first arrived, Leilani had been filled with worry for his health. Now, though, there were no concerns at all. Shi Shu was probably healthier now than he’d ever been in Ban Zi Zhen.He laid still, hands resting casually on Shi Shu’s hips as his hands wandered over his body, touching every inch of exposed skin that he could. He would lay here for as long as Shi Shu needed to explore, inhaling long and deep while his hands traced lower, his knee pushing against his groin.
And then it was over, Shi Shu sitting up and looking like he had just made a grand discovery — because he had. He, apparently, remembered how sex was supposed to work. He laughed, but the laugh quickly gave way to a breathy moan as Shi Shu rode on top of him, grinding their hips together in a way that was absolutely delightful and also painfully slow. He had been craving this for so long, and now Shi Shu was walking through it like he needed to be taught what to do with the thing dangling between his legs.
“A-Shu,” Leilani said, barely managing to get his words out between the little gasps and giggles that threatened to jump out of his throat. He really didn’t want to laugh at Shi Shu’s attempt at sex coupled with a historical lesson on how most virgins apparently got off with their partners. It was incredible that they had even reached this point. Leilani loved that he got to be here, holding Shi Shu’s hips and leaning up into each slow grind against his lap. He was sure that, with enough time, he could have gotten off with just that alone.His husband, the man he loved for so long, the man he’d been attracted to for so long, was finally responding in kind. He wanted to do this.
“You’re a very smart man, and I love you…very much,” Leilani said, teasing his fingers a bit lower, pushing them under the folds of the fabric still bunched around Shi Shu’s hips, barely clinging on without the sash to hold it. He could see the soft curve of his thighs, and beneath the fabric he knew there was pale skin, soft, and perfectly touchable. He wondered what his skin would look like beneath his hand, grabbed tight while he rocked into him, or sucked him off, or any number of any lewd things.
“But…maybe we can save the sex education lecture…for afterwards?” Leilani asked, sliding one of his hands over Shi Shu’s thigh and just gently grazing his fingers over his crotch, where he could feel a small bulge forming, thanks to Shi Shu’s very important foreplay.
Leilani was already very turned on, heart pounding and body aching for more, swelling underneath the light fabric of his skirt and undergarments. The friction of their clothes and Shi Shu’s hips would get him where he wanted, but there was so much more they could do — so much more that he’d imagined each time he dreamed, or when he snuck out of bed early in the morning to work through a few issues before Shi Shu noticed. Leilani had been very careful about revealing his arousal around Shi Shu, staying in bed longer, heading to the bathroom when he thought Shi Shu wasn’t looking. His main goal this whole time had been to not make Shi Shu feel uncomfortable.“You said…you couldn’t really talk or…or listen when I was touching your horn,” Leilani said. “This is, mm…basically the same.”
He, after some debate, pushed a bit on Shi Shu’s hips and flipped their positions, now straddling him on the bed and taking control of the scenario. He took a moment to breathe and steady himself, though he felt he could have cum just from the sight of Shi Shu laying beneath him. His hair was splayed around him with no rhyme or reason, laying like silk over their sheets. His face was flushed, his body just the slightest bit pink, and his lips swollen from kissing.Sex looked good on him.
“I want to do something,” Leilani said, briefly treating Shi Shu to what he had been giving to him. He rubbed their hips together, slow and firm — deliberate. “If you don’t like it, or if I’m bad at it, you can tell me to stop and I will.”Though, he had a feeling that once he got started, Shi Shu wouldn’t want him to stop. Such was the nature of such things — once things were underway it was hard to stop them. He knew that from experience. But he had a feeling that Shi Shu might not. He’d been here for so long, but he never once saw him sneak away to the bathroom, or ask for a moment alone.
This was a lot of firsts for them both, and he hoped that they were good ones.
Months ago, Shi Shu could have stated, and quite genuinely too, that he didn’t quite understand the appeal of sex. He could…maybe understand that the objective was quite tempting, but the process hadn’t sounded all too appealing to him. The idea of sweaty bodies moving together, smearing body fluids all over each other, hadn’t been exactly alluring to him.
That Shi Shu, though, was a fool.
A poor, ignorant fool that had no idea that Leilani would look so delectable laying underneath him, waves and curls spread like a halo around his head, his smile pleased and eyes dark with lust as his strong, warm hands gripped his hips, fingers digging into his skin through the fabric…
O-Oh—Shi Shu’s heart stuttered in his chest, and the tiny little sounds that dragged out of Leilani’s wonderful mouth, with each motion of his hips, resonated deep in the pits of his stomach, making him feel warm and tingly in ways that he hadn’t felt….ever, actually.
Now that he thought about it, Shi Shu couldn’t recall arousal ever feeling this strong; sharp and deep, like a knife made out of sheer pleasure digging straight into his guts. And it only got better when Leilani returned the favor, hips twitching upwards to meet his, and with each motion, Shi Shu’s breath caught in his throat, little gasps that threatened to become embarrassing and desperate whimpers as the pleasure poured into him, like an unending fountain of wonderful sensations.And yet. It wasn’t enough, somehow.
It was like an itch, the type that constantly shifted around, never satisfied no matter what and it was, unfortunately, a sensation that Shi Shu was painfully familiar with.
After all, Ban Zi Zhen prided itself on their pristine principles, with a possibly unhealthy obsession with the concept of ‘purity’…and what a better way to put those principles to use, than to apply them to their own princes and princesses, and make a shining bright example out of them?As soon as he’d hit puberty, Shi Shu had earned the right to wear his hair up like an adult, his robes were replaced with bigger robed, with double the layers and with sleeves that dragged across the ground, and more importantly; he was made to sit down in front of an Elder, and spent a whole morning learning a lesson that would torture him for years to come.
Giving himself pleasure was not only a sin, but also strictly forbidden—they’d told him, forcing him to write that down 100 times, until he could nearly visualize it in the back of his eyelids— he had to save himself for his future spouse after all, and to grant himself such relief before the time came, wouldn’t just be terribly selfish but also thoroughly disrespectful. Without even getting started on how it showed his lack of patience and self-control, which would have been highly frown upon.But even Shi Shu, was only human. And his budding hormones hadn’t particularly cared about his self-imposed morals.
And yet still, every year, Shi Shu could have counted on one single hand, how many times he’d touched himself. Even that, though, was a long time ago.After all, war hardly provided the privacy and peace of mind necessary to accomplish the necessary…requirements to engage in such activities.
So, all things considered—Shi Shu reasoned, fighting back a whole-body shudder when Leilani’s hands found his bare legs, heart hammering away in his chest when they slid upwards, dangerously close to where his robes were bundled up around his hips, concealing the proof of how own perked up interest—it certainly made sense that he’d be extra responsive and, quite honestly, he felt that he deserved a pat in the back for handling this as well as he did! How many people out there could handle nearly three decades of celibacy?! Especially when his husband was—
Hard—the new train of thought slammed straight into the previous one, forcing it off it’s tracks as it completely consumed every space available of his entire brain, sparing nothing for the remains of his previous lingering thoughts. How had he missed it, heavens, he’d been so focused flipping through the mental pages of his mental encyclopedia that he’d failed to notice the obvious pressure jabbing at him.
But now that he did, Shi Shu couldn’t help but be hyperaware of it’s existence; every thrust and grind was now aimed with the single objective of testing the newly added element, his own arousal twitching underneath the bundled up layers hiding it with each tentative drag across it—And then a gasp startled out of him, startling him out of his thoughts again, as a hand grazed his crotch but didn’t linger there, offering absolutely no relief. Shi Shu’s cheeks burned so hard that they nearly stung, but unfortunately, shame did nothing to tame the fire in the pits of his stomach; if anything, he felt himself get even harder, seeking that pressure again but to no vain.
“I-I..I’m…” He what?! Even Shi Shu didn’t know, his brain too muddled with arousal to form a string of coherent thought, his thighs twitching slightly when Leilani slipped his hand underneath the pile of robes to stroke skin that had never seen the daylight.
Thankfully, Leilani didn’t give him too much time to stress over what he wanted to say, because the very next moment, the world around him spun around and Shi Shu found himself laying back against the bed, legs still on each side of Leilani’s hips, hair and robes disheveled around him, while Leilani hovered above him—
Shi Shu’s throat bobbed into a hard swallow before he could even help himself. This wasn’t fair, not the slightest bit; he’d thought that he liked having Leilani laying underneath him, but this was…well, it did things to Shi Shu. Things that made his concealed boner twitch and leak underneath his robes, his heartbeat strumming a frantic song across his veins as he stared up at Leilani through half-lidded eyes, watching his hair dangle in messy waves around him, taking in the smaller details like, the flushed bottom lip that he’d just sucked between his teeth moments before, the rare warm hue that colored his cheeks, the pure, raw hunger that dilated his eyes…The pressure of their hips connecting once again was completely unnecessary; Shi Shu was pretty sure that he was already leaning towards the edge just from laying underneath his husband like this, and maybe he was too pent up already, but he couldn’t help the way his back arched away from the bed with a gasp, when Leilani bucks harder, much firmer than his own previous tentative little back-and-forth motions.
He wasn’t going to last—Shi Shu suddenly realized, with amounting mortification, anther sharp gasp pushing out of his lungs with the next thrust.
“Y-Yes,” Shi Shu breathed out, struggling for a moment to gather enough saliva and sense into his mouth before he could upgrade to longer sentences. “I…you can do as you wish, but uh, fair warning?” He mumbled, nervously shifting his gaze away. “I…hm…haven’t done…anything in a…more or less, lets say, in the last 5 or so years…?” Shi Shu confessed, sheepishly, squeezing his eyes shut as if that would somehow save him some dignity. “I-I honestly don’t know how uh…how much I’m going to last, nuan nan…”
Leilani was given permission to do whatever he wanted, and that was almost scary. Shi Shu was like the entire ocean when Leilani was used to playing only in a puddle.
“That’s okay,” Leilani said, leaning down to press a kiss to Shi Shu’s cheek and then his lips. He didn’t care how long Shi Shu lasted, or if he didn’t even last a minute at all. The fact that he would be able to get him off was enough, and Leilani was reveling in that fact. He was being allowed to touch Shi Shu however he wanted.
To give Shi Shu that kind of untethered pleasure was, as far as he was concerned, the best belated birthday gift he could give him.
He slid backwards, positioning himself between Shi Shu’s legs and, cautiously, as if trying not to spook a baby deer in the woods, pushed the fabric of Shi Shu’s robes aside. As he’d suspected, Shi Shu was quite aroused, bulging against his underwear and even leaking through it. It was Leilani’s first time seeing such a thing. Sure, he had looked down at his own erection before, but this was someone else’s. How different could it be, though?
Somehow, even if it was exactly the same, it felt much more thrilling. This…was because of him. Shi Shu was hard because of him. He was turned on because of him.
He reached his hand out and rubbed his palm against the bulge, through the fabric, testing the waters. He avoided Shi Shu’s gaze at first — not sure if he could bring himself to look at someone while he was doing this. But then, he wanted to see how he looked. He wanted to see if he was reacting the right ways — if he was doing a good job.
So, with red cheeks, he chanced a glance up at Shi Shu.
He imagined they both looked about the same — breathless and twitching, faces red with lust and embarrassment. It was beautiful.
Carefully, slowly, he slid his fingertips beneath the waist of Shi Shu’s underwear and began pulling it downward, careful not to drag it over his erection too hard. When his arousal sprung free, naked and dripping, Leilani felt butterflies tickling his stomach. They were really doing this. This was really happening.He helped Shi Shu’s ankles out from the holes of his undergarments, then kissed his way back up his legs, hands running over the soft, pale skin. His fingers trembled just slightly with nerves as he approached the object of his intent. He had touched himself plenty of times, sure, but sucked himself off? Never. That was impossible. He had no idea if he would be good at it or if it even mattered. Anything would probably feel good as long as he didn’t bite Shi Shu’s dick off…
He knelt between Shi Shu, his own erection neglected and pressed firmly against his underwear, begging for attention. He was thankful for his skirt to hide it from Shi Shu’s eyes — for now, anyway.
He took a short breath and reached one of his hands out, wrapping it carefully around Shi Shu’s length, running his thumb over the sensitive tip and smearing precum downwards, over the shaft. The simple action had himself throbbing, turned on by such a lewd sight. Gods, how he had craved this. How many nights had he laid awake praying that one day Shi Shu would want to lay with him? How many nights had he snuck away to touch himself and pretend it was Shi Shu’s hand. How many dreams had he had that involved this exact scenario — him leaning down between Shi Shu’s legs and sliding his mouth over his erection, all while keeping his eyes locked onto his face. He wanted to see every emotion, every ounce of embarrassment, nerves and pleasure. He wanted to witness it all. Maybe that made him a pervert, or maybe that made him a man who was sexually starved. He didn’t care. Every little gesture Shi Shu made sent thrills through his body.
Leilani balanced his weight on his knees and his forearm, which rested on Shi Shu’s upper thigh while he pushed his lips down over the shaft. He opened his mouth a little further and laid his tongue flat against the underside, taking in the taste of bitter and salt. His free hand, mean while, slipped between his own legs, applying consistent pressure to his erection, trying to sate it without pushing himself too far. His body begged for more and he refused to give it. Maybe he really was a pervert.
Still, he leaned down and pushed further, having to shut his eyes as he swallowed Shi Shu’s length as far as he could, leaving just enough room at the base for his hand to steady his hips and his erection. He pulled back and pushed in again, teasing his tongue around the tip each time he did. He wanted to hear Shi Shu moan. He wanted to feel him finish. He wanted to know what his trembling hips would feel like, what he would taste like, if he could cum just from this. Five years without doing anything — surely he wouldn’t last long.He picked up his ministrations, his mouth making lewd sounds against Shi Shu’s skin, his body pushing out little moans of its own as a new feeling or sight made him throb. He rubbed his other hand firmly between his legs, resisting the urge to buck against his palm and speed things up. Leilani would have his turn. He would have his moment. Shi Shu had spent the last three days without his husband. He’d feared he would never see him again.. He needed this. He deserved it. And Leilani would give it to him.
To say Shi Shu was nervous would be an understatement; his nerves were so on edge that he feared that he might still be shaking for days after this.
From a rational level, Shi Shu was well aware of the list of possibilities of what could possibly happen now, but it was one thing to know, and a whole different beast to experience it.
He could have listen out loud 69 different positions and their benefits according to the gender of the participants, but in terms of experience, he was still sitting on stage zero!
And at this point, he knew damn well that he couldn’t fully trust his books to tell him the full truth; he’d read so many romances, read all sorts of lewd descriptions, but not a single one of of those stories could have possibly braced him for the sensation of another person’s breath and warmth in his mouth, the slippery feeling of a tongue that didn’t belong in his mouth, the way Leilani’s bottom lip always looked so flushed and swollen after he sucked on it and traced his tongue across it…
If a kiss had felt so different from what he’d imagined, then Shi Shu could only wait in a mix of excitement and barely concealed nervousness, as his husband began his descent.
Staring pointedly at the ceiling, Shi Shu took a long deep breath—which then practically stuttered out of his chest when Leilani pushed the rest of his robes aside, baring him completely except for his underwear….which was doing a terrible job at concealing anything at this point, Shi Shu could tell that much without having to even look down—he could feel the strain of his cock trying to stretch the fabric, specially now that the weight of his robes was gone, leaving him pointedly aware of the wetness that he could feel gathering inside his underwear and oh god, it was probably seeping through the fabric, and Leilani was staring and there was no way that there wasn’t a massive stain on the front and Leilani was—
“M-hm!” Shi Shu whimpered, startling at the sudden contact, instinctively looking down and…and heavens, that was a terrible decision, because Leilani was already looking up at him, watching him with an intensity that should be straight up illegal, and his cheeks were so red, redder than Shi Shu had ever seen, and under any other circumstances, he might have reached down to cup that warm cheek in his hand, maybe pull him up to watch it more closely…
But! Maybe not when he had his hand pressed right against his boner!
Fingers hooked around his underwear just as his head snapped back to stare intensely at the ceiling, and if Shi Shu had felt bared before, then he wasn’t even sure how to process his own nakedness the moment his underwear slipped down his legs, leaving every single inch of his skin naked and exposed to Leilani’s eager gaze. And right there, standing tall and proud, the darn traitor that throbbed eagerly for attention, so honest compared to it’s owner.
It took several deep breaths, just to keep his heart from crawling out of his throat as he felt Leilani’s hands caressing his legs, his legs twitching occasionally, fighting back the urge to quickly clap them closed, specially when he felt Leilani coming closer, so close that he could feel the warmth of his body before he even touched him.
But when he did, it nearly sent Shi Shu flying through the freaking roof.
A warm hand, bigger and stronger than his own, cradled and engulfed his cock in a way that his own, much thinner hand could never achieve, and that alone was enough to make Shi Shu’s hips cant upwards, seeking more of that touch. “A-Ah—!” Shi Shu threw his head back, hips twitching minusculely when a calloused thumb pressed against the tip, something akin to a pained whine squeezing out of his throat when that same desperately needed pressure vanished, leaving him twitching with dissatisfaction.
Too riled up to care about embarrassment at this point, Shi Shu finally tilted his head down again to see what had made Leilani stop.
His bravery was rewarded with a sight that would haunt his dreams for months, if not years; Leilani braced on his legs, face flustered as he slowly leaned down to take his length into his mouth, full lips pressing like a kiss against the wet crown before spreading open wide, taking him inside, smearing a trail of precum across his tongue—
“L-Leilani! You—!” The alarm in his voice merged into a moan, and suddenly he wasn’t even sure what he was trying to say. In fact, he was pretty sure that anything that resembled or was close to coherent thought had just poured out of his head through his ears; all that was left was Leilani, and the wet, warm and tight slide of his mouth as he swallowed him whole, just pure, raw pleasure dripping down every inch of his body like Shi Shu had never felt it before, making his toes curls against the mattress and his stomach flutter with each shaky breath that he took.
Heavens, the most he’d ever known was the rare encounters with his own hand, and those had been painfully dry, rushed, and mingled heavily with a dosage of self-deprecating guilt. And now, he wasn’t sure if he would ever want the touch of his own hand again, though, after experiencing this.
This should just be their new nightly routine from now on, or even their morning routine, he certainly wasn’t picky—Shi Shu thought, somewhere in the scattered mess of his thoughts, too lost and drowning in the sea of sensations that was Leilani’s mouth to care about ‘shame’ or any of the other useless things that usually stood like a filter between his thoughts and his actions.
Shi Shu’s hands moved without even bothering to request any form of consent from his brain, shaky as they reached down to stroke Leilani’s cheek—breath hitching in his throat when he realized that he could literally feel himself through it—before sliding up to bury his fingers in his hair; not pulling, not tugging, just nervously kneading his curls like one might squeeze a stressball.
Shi Shu wasn’t a loud person. His voice was always kept at a nice, pleasant tone, his happiness was quiet and often expressed through the barrier of a decorative fan, and even when he was mad or frustrated, he would never raise his voice.
Therefor, knowing himself as well as he did, Shi Shu was genuinely shocked when a moan blurted out of his mouth just when Leilani teased the tip of his cock with his tongue, a sound that returned over and over again, more and more frequent with each repetition; deep breaths gradually becoming ragged, breathless gasps becoming proper whimpers when he increased his pace, his mouth, for once, refusing to be silenced.
“Nuan nan—nuan nan! I…I can’t—oh god!” Shi Shu whimpered, his grip on his hair tightening and his eyes squeezed shut—which, again, was even worst, because now he could hear every single little sound, every wet, slippery slide of Leilani’s mouth around him, the wet strokes of his tongue when he stopped at the top, his groans and frantic breaths as he….
And then, like an epiphany, it suddenly struck him; there was only one hand on him.
There was only one arm braced on his leg, only one hand wrapped around his length, but he couldn’t feel Leilani’s other hand anywhere else in his body.
Forcing his eyes open, Shi Shu hesitantly peered down at Leilani.
….He found his other arm.
Shi Shu had never seen another man pleasuring himself. Not even himself. All of his affairs with his hand had happened through the tissue that he would wrap around himself first, and it was either under the six layers of blankets in his bed, or in the bath, where his hand would be hidden away from view under a layer of bubbles, so that he could almost pretend that he wasn’t doing anything wrong, just innocently washing himself. Thoroughly.
He couldn’t tear his eyes away, though, from the hand moving stiffly between Leilani’s legs, like he was just barely holding himself back from rubbing himself raw, and although the skirts of Pali Kai had a lot of room, Shi Shu could see as clear as day, the bulge pressed against his own hand.
His hand twitched where it gripped Leilani’s shoulder; he wanted to touch it. He wanted to know how it would feel, to weight it in his palm, feel it’s warmth, it’s girth, he wanted to see Leilani’s face twisted with pure pleasure as he wrapped his hand around him—would his hands even be big enough, oh god, what if he had to use two hands, and why was the thought so dangerously trilling—and then, maybe…maybe he’d be able to show him what he’d learned with him, and gods above, he wanted to, he wanted him so badly—
Shi Shu’s cock gave a happy little throb inside Leilani’s mouth, the pressure behind his balls suddenly drew taunt, and before Shi Shu could help it, his hips began to twitch, desperately chasing after the heat of his mouth even though he actually meant to do the opposite. “N-Nuan nan, stand back! I can’t—I’m so close, I’m so—!” Shi Shu whimpered, trying desperately to pull his head back, but his hands were too shaky, and he was so close, so close that he could almost taste it, the sensation almost edging towards the wrong side of too much by the time he tipped over the edge.
A ragged moan poured out of his throat as if he was being gutted alive, his back arching off the bed as his whole body convulsed, as years of pent up energy and sexual-repression poured out of him.
Shi Shu wasn’t even sure what he was saying; he was vaguely aware of hearing himself saying something making to ‘so good, so good to me’, a scrambled mess in Ban Zi Zhen’s dialect that could be summed up as just a continuous and desperate string of lewd pleas that he would never translate to Leilani, and repetitive warnings trying to tell Leilani to pull away.
He didn’t, though.
And maybe in a few minutes, he would be able to feel thoroughly mortified over the fact that he could literally feel himself pouring his cum inside Leilani’s mouth like a fountain, mostly because he could feel some leaking out of his mouth and running down the sides of his sated erection…but right now, Shi Shu didn’t have the strength to even think, much less gather enough to be anxious about anything.
Finally coming down from it’s high, Shi Shu’s body dropped back against the bed, still shaking and twitching, skin flushed pink and chest heaving like he’d just ran for miles.
How was he meant to just…move on with his day after this? No wonder people always did this at night, he could hardly bear the thought of moving, much less walk.
“…Nuan nan.” Shi Shu rasped out, his throat dry and slightly sore, but his tone was dripping like hot melted chocolate, lazy and languid from the afterglow, looking like a pile of just content and thoroughly sated shaky limbs.
It only lasted so long, though; the moment he managed to crack his eyes open again, Shi Shu’s gaze dropped back on Leilani, and the consequences hit him like a slap to the face.
“Oh. O-Oh no! We…we need to get you a cup, water, a towel, oh gods, I just—! In your mouth, oh no I didn’t mean to—!” He spluttered, clumsy limbs, still buzzing and everything, already trying to sit up to grab all the necessary items.
Shameless? Was Shi Shu really going to say that wanting to admire his body was shameless when they were doing, well, this? He didn’t know how far they would go — if they would go all the way — but, for someone who wouldn’t even look at his bare chest a month or so ago, this was far more shameless than anything else.
Shi Shu pulled his hands free of his sleeves, giving Leilani a perfect glimpse of his long arms, the elegant bend of his elbow and curve of his shoulder. Being in Pali Kai had been good for Shi Shu. He could see a bit of a tan line around his collarbone, and he’d gained weight back from his time imprisoned, finally looking less skeletal. Shi Shu always looked elegant and beautiful, though when he first arrived, Leilani had been filled with worry for his health. Now, though, there were no concerns at all. Shi Shu was probably healthier now than he’d ever been in Ban Zi Zhen.He laid still, hands resting casually on Shi Shu’s hips as his hands wandered over his body, touching every inch of exposed skin that he could. He would lay here for as long as Shi Shu needed to explore, inhaling long and deep while his hands traced lower, his knee pushing against his groin.
And then it was over, Shi Shu sitting up and looking like he had just made a grand discovery — because he had. He, apparently, remembered how sex was supposed to work. He laughed, but the laugh quickly gave way to a breathy moan as Shi Shu rode on top of him, grinding their hips together in a way that was absolutely delightful and also painfully slow. He had been craving this for so long, and now Shi Shu was walking through it like he needed to be taught what to do with the thing dangling between his legs.
“A-Shu,” Leilani said, barely managing to get his words out between the little gasps and giggles that threatened to jump out of his throat. He really didn’t want to laugh at Shi Shu’s attempt at sex coupled with a historical lesson on how most virgins apparently got off with their partners. It was incredible that they had even reached this point. Leilani loved that he got to be here, holding Shi Shu’s hips and leaning up into each slow grind against his lap. He was sure that, with enough time, he could have gotten off with just that alone.His husband, the man he loved for so long, the man he’d been attracted to for so long, was finally responding in kind. He wanted to do this.
“You’re a very smart man, and I love you…very much,” Leilani said, teasing his fingers a bit lower, pushing them under the folds of the fabric still bunched around Shi Shu’s hips, barely clinging on without the sash to hold it. He could see the soft curve of his thighs, and beneath the fabric he knew there was pale skin, soft, and perfectly touchable. He wondered what his skin would look like beneath his hand, grabbed tight while he rocked into him, or sucked him off, or any number of any lewd things.
“But…maybe we can save the sex education lecture…for afterwards?” Leilani asked, sliding one of his hands over Shi Shu’s thigh and just gently grazing his fingers over his crotch, where he could feel a small bulge forming, thanks to Shi Shu’s very important foreplay.
Leilani was already very turned on, heart pounding and body aching for more, swelling underneath the light fabric of his skirt and undergarments. The friction of their clothes and Shi Shu’s hips would get him where he wanted, but there was so much more they could do — so much more that he’d imagined each time he dreamed, or when he snuck out of bed early in the morning to work through a few issues before Shi Shu noticed. Leilani had been very careful about revealing his arousal around Shi Shu, staying in bed longer, heading to the bathroom when he thought Shi Shu wasn’t looking. His main goal this whole time had been to not make Shi Shu feel uncomfortable.“You said…you couldn’t really talk or…or listen when I was touching your horn,” Leilani said. “This is, mm…basically the same.”
He, after some debate, pushed a bit on Shi Shu’s hips and flipped their positions, now straddling him on the bed and taking control of the scenario. He took a moment to breathe and steady himself, though he felt he could have cum just from the sight of Shi Shu laying beneath him. His hair was splayed around him with no rhyme or reason, laying like silk over their sheets. His face was flushed, his body just the slightest bit pink, and his lips swollen from kissing.Sex looked good on him.
“I want to do something,” Leilani said, briefly treating Shi Shu to what he had been giving to him. He rubbed their hips together, slow and firm — deliberate. “If you don’t like it, or if I’m bad at it, you can tell me to stop and I will.”Though, he had a feeling that once he got started, Shi Shu wouldn’t want him to stop. Such was the nature of such things — once things were underway it was hard to stop them. He knew that from experience. But he had a feeling that Shi Shu might not. He’d been here for so long, but he never once saw him sneak away to the bathroom, or ask for a moment alone.
This was a lot of firsts for them both, and he hoped that they were good ones.
Months ago, Shi Shu could have stated, and quite genuinely too, that he didn’t quite understand the appeal of sex. He could…maybe understand that the objective was quite tempting, but the process hadn’t sounded all too appealing to him. The idea of sweaty bodies moving together, smearing body fluids all over each other, hadn’t been exactly alluring to him.
That Shi Shu, though, was a fool.
A poor, ignorant fool that had no idea that Leilani would look so delectable laying underneath him, waves and curls spread like a halo around his head, his smile pleased and eyes dark with lust as his strong, warm hands gripped his hips, fingers digging into his skin through the fabric…
O-Oh—Shi Shu’s heart stuttered in his chest, and the tiny little sounds that dragged out of Leilani’s wonderful mouth, with each motion of his hips, resonated deep in the pits of his stomach, making him feel warm and tingly in ways that he hadn’t felt….ever, actually.
Now that he thought about it, Shi Shu couldn’t recall arousal ever feeling this strong; sharp and deep, like a knife made out of sheer pleasure digging straight into his guts.
And it only got better when Leilani returned the favor, hips twitching upwards to meet his, and with each motion, Shi Shu’s breath caught in his throat, little gasps that threatened to become embarrassing and desperate whimpers as the pleasure poured into him, like an unending fountain of wonderful sensations.
And yet. It wasn’t enough, somehow.
It was like an itch, the type that constantly shifted around, never satisfied no matter what and it was, unfortunately, a sensation that Shi Shu was painfully familiar with.
After all, Ban Zi Zhen prided itself on their pristine principles, with a possibly unhealthy obsession with the concept of ‘purity’…and what a better way to put those principles to use, than to apply them to their own princes and princesses, and make a shining bright example out of them?
As soon as he’d hit puberty, Shi Shu had earned the right to wear his hair up like an adult, his robes were replaced with bigger robed, with double the layers and with sleeves that dragged across the ground, and more importantly; he was made to sit down in front of an Elder, and spent a whole morning learning a lesson that would torture him for years to come.
Giving himself pleasure was not only a sin, but also strictly forbidden—they’d told him, forcing him to write that down 100 times, until he could nearly visualize it in the back of his eyelids— he had to save himself for his future spouse after all, and to grant himself such relief before the time came, wouldn’t just be terribly selfish but also thoroughly disrespectful. Without even getting started on how it showed his lack of patience and self-control, which would have been highly frown upon.
But even Shi Shu, was only human. And his budding hormones hadn’t particularly cared about his self-imposed morals.
And yet still, every year, Shi Shu could have counted on one single hand, how many times he’d touched himself. Even that, though, was a long time ago.
After all, war hardly provided the privacy and peace of mind necessary to accomplish the necessary…requirements to engage in such activities.
So, all things considered—Shi Shu reasoned, fighting back a whole-body shudder when Leilani’s hands found his bare legs, heart hammering away in his chest when they slid upwards, dangerously close to where his robes were bundled up around his hips, concealing the proof of how own perked up interest—it certainly made sense that he’d be extra responsive and, quite honestly, he felt that he deserved a pat in the back for handling this as well as he did! How many people out there could handle nearly three decades of celibacy?! Especially when his husband was—
Hard—the new train of thought slammed straight into the previous one, forcing it off it’s tracks as it completely consumed every space available of his entire brain, sparing nothing for the remains of his previous lingering thoughts. How had he missed it, heavens, he’d been so focused flipping through the mental pages of his mental encyclopedia that he’d failed to notice the obvious pressure jabbing at him.
But now that he did, Shi Shu couldn’t help but be hyperaware of it’s existence; every thrust and grind was now aimed with the single objective of testing the newly added element, his own arousal twitching underneath the bundled up layers hiding it with each tentative drag across it—
And then a gasp startled out of him, startling him out of his thoughts again, as a hand grazed his crotch but didn’t linger there, offering absolutely no relief. Shi Shu’s cheeks burned so hard that they nearly stung, but unfortunately, shame did nothing to tame the fire in the pits of his stomach; if anything, he felt himself get even harder, seeking that pressure again but to no vain.
“I-I..I’m…” He what?! Even Shi Shu didn’t know, his brain too muddled with arousal to form a string of coherent thought, his thighs twitching slightly when Leilani slipped his hand underneath the pile of robes to stroke skin that had never seen the daylight.
Thankfully, Leilani didn’t give him too much time to stress over what he wanted to say, because the very next moment, the world around him spun around and Shi Shu found himself laying back against the bed, legs still on each side of Leilani’s hips, hair and robes disheveled around him, while Leilani hovered above him—
Shi Shu’s throat bobbed into a hard swallow before he could even help himself. This wasn’t fair, not the slightest bit; he’d thought that he liked having Leilani laying underneath him, but this was…well, it did things to Shi Shu. Things that made his concealed boner twitch and leak underneath his robes, his heartbeat strumming a frantic song across his veins as he stared up at Leilani through half-lidded eyes, watching his hair dangle in messy waves around him, taking in the smaller details like, the flushed bottom lip that he’d just sucked between his teeth moments before, the rare warm hue that colored his cheeks, the pure, raw hunger that dilated his eyes…
The pressure of their hips connecting once again was completely unnecessary; Shi Shu was pretty sure that he was already leaning towards the edge just from laying underneath his husband like this, and maybe he was too pent up already, but he couldn’t help the way his back arched away from the bed with a gasp, when Leilani bucks harder, much firmer than his own previous tentative little back-and-forth motions.
He wasn’t going to last—Shi Shu suddenly realized, with amounting mortification, anther sharp gasp pushing out of his lungs with the next thrust.
“Y-Yes,” Shi Shu breathed out, struggling for a moment to gather enough saliva and sense into his mouth before he could upgrade to longer sentences. “I…you can do as you wish, but uh, fair warning?” He mumbled, nervously shifting his gaze away. “I…hm…haven’t done…anything in a…more or less, lets say, in the last 5 or so years…?” Shi Shu confessed, sheepishly, squeezing his eyes shut as if that would somehow save him some dignity. “I-I honestly don’t know how uh…how much I’m going to last, nuan nan…”
If someone was a fool in their relationship, that fool was Shi Shu, not Leilani; in fact, Shi Shu could have provided a lengthy list of all the different occasions where he’d made a fool out of himself in front of his husband over the most ridiculous and unnecessary obstacles, ranging from getting a second wedding just to help himself process the new turn in their relationship, to needing to nearly lose his husband to realize that maybe it was about time to stop stalling and let things flow naturally.
He would have told him exactly that, if Leilani hadn’t shut him up before he could even begin. That was fine, though, Shi Shu personally found that kissing was far more pleasant and more productive than running his mouth endlessly over things that didn’t really matter in the end. They were both fools, in their own ridiculous ways—Shi Shu would just stick to that, and argue later about the details and percentages of their individual idiocy.
The shift in the mood laid somewhere between sudden and natural—not too out of nowhere that it left Shi Shu flabbergasted, but also not so expected that he could stop himself from blushing when he realized where this was going—, and Shi Shu was as terribly farsighted as ever, but even his blurred eyesight couldn’t make him blind to the hunger in Leilani’s eyes, to the sheer wanting that his hands spelled out with each stroke across his back, even if it was beyond him what he saw in him that made him worthy of that look.
A week ago, this would probably be the point where Shi Shu would put an end to this; he would have smiled apologetically, blush, and then gently coax Leilani to go to sleep with him, like a wet cloth laid over a fire.
Today, though, Shi Shu leaned against his touch instead of pulling away, his face burning but there was no hint of unwillingness or hesitance on his body language. “Ah, my cruel neglectful husband, at last taking care of his husbandly duties.” Shi Shu teased, chuckling as he leaned in for another kiss, and another, and another, distractedly leaning more and more of his body weight against him, too busy getting reacquainted with Leilani’s mouth like they hadn’t kissed for a whole year, too distracted to notice that their bodies were leaning further back and at a rather precarious angle….
When gravity eventually gave in and did it’s job, Shi Shu’s startled squeak was effectively muffled in Leilani’s mouth, and it was only due to sheer pure luck that Shi Shu was, somehow, fast enough to pull his mouth away before their bodies collided back against the bed, narrowly avoiding knocking a few teeth out of each other’s mouth.
Blinking down at the husband that he had currently trapped underneath him, Shi Shu suddenly ducked his head and muffled a snort on the crook of his neck, shoulders shaking with barely repressed laugher. “I don’t think we’re both going to make it out alive.” He mused breathlessly, eyes curved with mirth as he leaned down to kiss him again, his hair falling like a curtain around them, blocking out the sunlight…
Sunlight. Oh god, they were so backwards! Most couples would have their first time preferably at night, under the romantic glow of the candlelights, maybe when they were still warm and languid from a bath…
And then, there was them; in the early afternoon, the sun shining brightly above them, like an accusing reminder that ‘this is literally the most unromantic hour of the day, why not reschedule it for later?!’, right after the emotional ‘return’ of his husband.
Honestly, the only way that they could have fucked up the order even further, was if they’d married, had sex, and only kissed for the first time during the afterglow. Shi Shu gave them both a mental pat in the back for at the least getting one thing right, for once.
“I should…I should have made you put on a shirt.” Shi Shu mumbled between kisses, barely pulling away to speak, a hand shyly tracing one of Leilani’s bare shoulders, like he wasn’t already faced with a shirtless Leilani on a daily basis already. Heavens, he slept on that chest! Every night!
“It’s not fair, you’re already one step ahead….as usual.” He clarified, chuckling breathlessly as he dived into another kiss, trying to shift into a more comfortable position, but amidst his attempts to compensate their height difference by pulling himself up, Shi Shu’s knee accidentally slipped, landing his thigh right between Leilani’s legs, and right against his groin.
Shi Shu’s head snapped up so abruptly that he nearly got whiplash from the sudden motion, eyes wide with shock and concern. “Oh God! S-Sorry, did I hurt you, nuan nan?!”
Leilani laughed into the kiss, but the gesture shut up any potential rebuttals he might have had. From his perspective then, Shi Shu really has been neglected, but things were different with hindsight and clarity. There were so many things that they needed to change and so many things they still needed to work on, but they would learn and they would grow. They would have plenty of time to figure out how to best communicate with each other, how to enjoy each other and understand each other. He was sure that plenty of couples spent years learning. Hell, they were even learning right now.
Shi Shu was learning heavily against him and the only thing stopping Leilani from steadying them both from falling was knowing that there was a bed right behind them. So, he let them fall and he was glad he did. The squeak and laughter from his husband was well worth it, lighting a smile on his face that he didn’t think would ever dim.
Leilani knew he wouldn’t make it out of this alive. Already he felt as if his spirit was ascending to heaven, blessed by the open permission to touch and be touched. Shi Shu was more than eager for some reason, and Leilani would treasure each moment. Every new step satisfied him, no matter how small it was. If Shi Shu allowed him to kiss him on the cheek after a meeting it was considered a victory. This was like winning ten marathons in a row and not even being a little bit sore. This was its own kind of high, and he would never come down from it.
“Mm, I may be one step ahead but your robes are— oh!” Leilani’s retort was swallowed by a kiss and he happily indulged, reaching up and burrowing his hands into Shi Shu’s hair, tangling it around his fingers.
And then Shi Shu slipped, and his surprised reaction pulled laughter from his chest. The pressure in between his thighs wasn’t entirely uncomfortable, and to be honest, he felt like this position worked best for Shi Shu. It gave him more control, gave him the opportunity to lean back and take a breather. Leilani didn’t want him to feel like he was trapping him. If he was on top, he knew there would be no way he could hold back, given this new freedom he had.
“I’m fine, A-Shu,” Leilani assured him. “I don’t think you could hurt me, even by accident.”
He slid his hands down Shi Shu’s back to his waist, where a sash held his robes together. That was the thing about Shi Shu’s attire. Leilani may not have been wearing a shirt, but all it took to undo the intricate layers of Shi Shu’s robes was a quick tug on the bow at his back.
“The bed’s going to end up a mess of clothes because of all the layers you insist on wearing — hold on, I can’t even…there,” Leilani said, finally pulling the sash free and tossing it to the side. He wondered if this was what Ji Guang would have expected to hear from them each time he joked about them having sex. He probably expected moans and the aggressive creaking of a bed. Instead, he got laughter and confusion — which, really, summed up their entire relationship.
“It’ll be nicer when it’s summer and I can maybe convince you to wear just a skirt,” he said as he tugged Shi Shu back down to his lips. Shi Shu would never go around shirtless, though. Leilani was lucky that he even got to sometimes see his chest.
Speaking of…
Kissing, Leilani felt confident about. He knew what he liked, and he knew what made Shi Shu blush all the way to the tips of his horns. He felt like he knew when Shi Shu would want a deep kiss, with open mouths and tongues and warm, short breaths shared in the small space between their bodies, and when he would prefer chaste kisses splayed across his neck and his jaw.
Touching, however, was an entirely new arena. Each time he tried slipping his hand between the fabric of Shi Shu’s robes he never got very far. Today, though, he was met with no resistance — it sent a thrill down his spine, pooling low in his abdomen.
He pushed his hands under Shi Shu’s robes and over his shoulders, tracing every bit of skin and bone and muscle. The fabric moved with him, sliding down Shi Shu’s arms and pooling down by his wrists and his waist.
Leilani had never felt so tempted.
Shi Shu’s pale body lay atop him, exposed and just the slightest bit pink. He wanted to kiss him everywhere. He wanted to stop and take it all in. He didn’t even care that it was the middle of the damn day — that made everything better. He could see every goosebump on Shi Shu’s skin, every scar, every blush.
He could get lost in just looking at him.
“Take your hands out of your sleeves,” Leilani murmured as he kissed his way across Shi Shu’s jaw. “They’re in the way of me admiring you.”
In the back of his head—where his thoughts were less muddled and still coherent enough—Shi Shu couldn’t help but snort lightly, his lips twitching with amusement despite his nerves as he watched Leilani struggle with his sash—a fairly simple sash too, nothing compared to the overlay of sashes that he had to use back in his kingdom, just to secure the small mountain of robes that he used to wrap himself with.
“Nuan nan, you wouldn’t say that if you realized just how many clothes I used to wear in Ban Zi Zhen.” He mused, and if he wasn’t already so pink, that would have done the trick alright, his brain, hungry and eager, quickly provided him with an array of mental scenarios revolving around that concept;
A frustrated but determined Leilani battling against his sash, hands diving hungrily through each layer that covered him, the bed a mess of discarded robes and yet, Ban Zi Zhen’s far more complex designs would have probably stalled him quite a bit, just enough to drive Leilani up the walls, while Shi Shu would just lay back, watching with great amusement and anticipation as his husband pushed handfuls of fabric aside, biting his lips as he waited for the moment where his hands would eventually, finally, find him underneath that mess, like a well-wrapped present just for him.
Heat stirred in the pits of his stomach, clawed into something deep inside of him, and by the time Leilani finished removing his sash, Shi Shu was so painfully turned on that he couldn’t even be bothered to lend an ear to his usual anxieties.
But, still not turned on enough to stop him from trying to squeak out a complaint over the skirt comment—it was unthinkable, heavens, he could feel his blood pressure spiking just from thinking about being shirtless in public!—, which turned out to be a useless attempt in the end, since Leilani just ate the complaints out of his mouth. Not that Shi Shu was complaining. In fact, Leilani was more than welcome to end or counterattack any argument like this.
“Hmm, ask again in 50 years. Maybe I’ll consider it, then.” He mumbled into his mouth, all too happy to just lay there, tracing his tongue across the edges of Leilani’s teeth and prodding a greeting against his tongue, but clearly Leilani was having none of that. Not when he was finally allowed to indulge himself into the one thing that he’d clearly wanted to do for ages, and that Shi Shu had denied him until today.
Leilani’s hands were warm and calloused when they slid against his skin, a sensation that made him shudder from head to toe—not in a bad way; never in a bad way—and that spread goosebumps across every inch of his skin. Silk slid down his arms and back, and although it was the warmest hour of the day, the air already thick with the afternoon heat, Shi Shu’s newly exposed skin still prickled as if exposed to cold air, a constant reminder of how bared he was.
Resisting the urgent and always-present urge to cross his arms and hide himself away from Leilani’s gaze, Shi Shu swallowed down his nerves and just allowed him to keep touching, exploring him like he didn’t have exactly two arms, one torso and two legs like everybody else.
And then, of course—Leilani had been too quiet, after all—, the embarrassment crawled back up again, as the words murmured against his jaw finally sunk in. “S-Shameless…like it shouldn’t be the other way around.” Shi Shu mumbled, burning like a furnace and honestly, he was half concerned that at some point, Leilani might not be able to touch him anymore because he was just that hot to the touch, but for now? He wasn’t going to think too hard about it unless he literally burned a hole through the mattress.
He meant what he said, too; between the two of them, Leilani was the one worthy of being admired. From his full lips, to his wonderful wavy hair, wide shoulders, the curves and dips of his muscles, his warm, tanned skin…there was just so much to drink in, and just because Shi Shu was well acquainted to all of that, it didn’t mean that he couldn’t still appreciate it thoroughly.
If anything; having all of that exposed to his eyes on a daily basis only made him want him even more, as it was one thing to not know what was hidden underneath the clothes, and another to see yet not be able to touch. It was like, being shown a fancy box without knowing what was inside, versus having a nice juicy steak waved right in front of him, just out of reach.
So, Shi Shu did eventually slid his hands out of his sleeves like he was asked, freeing his arms out of that tangled heap of fabric, but only so that he could do some exploration of his own; first cupping Leilani’s cheeks, thumbs shyly tracing over his plump lips before trailing down, tracing over the tendons of his neck and the sharp bone of his collarbone, fingertips light as he ran them over his shoulders and arms, and then harder, firmer as he brought them down his chest, finally getting to know on an intimate level every raise, bump, dip and curve of his torso, only stopping when his fingertips bumped against the sash of his skirt, thumbs still finishing tracing the V of his hips.
Satisfied with his explorations—for now—, Shi Shu finally leaned down again, kissing him languidly only to pull away a moment later, bringing his mouth to his ear instead, “I must have done great deeds in my past life, to deserve such a handsome husband.” Shi Shu muttered on his ear, his blood running too hot in his veins for him to bother with his any filters whatsoever, sighing contently as he slid his thigh higher between Leilani’s legs—
And then, as if stung awake, Shi Shu sat back up again like a rubber band snapping back into place, his gaze looking a little bit clearer and less fogged with lust as he stared down at Leilani with wide eyes. “Ah, that’s right! I read about this…” He mused, mostly to himself, brows furrowed with concentration as he adjusted his position, thigh pulling away from it’s previous position nestled between Leilani’s legs, so that he could fully straddle his lap properly.
“Please do feel free to add some input if anything feels off. Criticism is heavily welcome, nuan nan, and I only know how to do it in theory. But I believe it’s done this way…” Shi Shu said, his tone thoughtful and unnervingly alike the tone that he used whenever he tutored him on some subject, or even when he was gathering his facts for their next meeting.
Apparently satisfied with his ‘preparations’, Shi Shu braced his hands on Leilani’s chest, took a deep breath, and without any other warning whatsoever, proceeded to position himself right over Leilani’s groin, and began to firmly grind his hips back and forth in slow, almost circular motions.
Shi Shu’s breath stuttered for an abrupt moment, but he hurriedly gathered enough composure to keep talking; “This process mimics the most basic motions of intercourse, easing the transition into the actual act by stimulating our brains and bodies into recognizing that intercourse is under process. It is also an act in which younger and inexperienced people engage into, when they still lack the necessary notions of how coitus works.”
Shi Shu explained, so precise that he may as well have been just been reading it out loud straight from the book, his professional tone a sharp contrast with the languid motions of his hips and the heated flush that was quickly creeping down his shoulders and chest.